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Bob Hope’s Light-Hearted Approach To Golf

July 30, 2012 | By Chris Chirico | 1 Comment

We here at golfstinks obviously like to mix some comedy in with our golf.  And as you can see by some of our more recent posts, we like the comedians who mix a bit of golf into their routines – see Robin Williams, George Carlin and Jimmy Fallon with Chris Rock.

However, this past Friday marked the ninth anniversary of the passing of one of the greatest comedians who routinely mixed golf into his comedy – Bob Hope.

Bob Hope and Golf
Bob Hope (photo by Allan warren, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons)

But Bob Hope didn’t make fun of the game itself.  It was more of a self-depreciating type humor (He once said Titleist offered him a big contract to NOT play their balls), which was funny considering he was an avid golfer and a four handicap at his best.

Mr. Hope worked golf into his comedy routines so much that it became almost expected that a golf club would be in-hand or nearby whenever he could be seen on TV.  This included putting with a two-year-old Tiger Woods or playing in a foursome with three presidents.

But it was the golf comedy that leaves us with some of Mr. Hopes most memorable quotes.  Quotes including:

“Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.”

“I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.”

“A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.”

“Arnold Palmer told me how I could cut eight strokes off my score – skip one of the par 3s.”

It’s the non-serious and light-hearted way to which he approached the game that makes Bob Hope a hero in some forms to the average golfer.  A true voice to the stinky golfers of the world.  Despite his low handicap, Mr. Hope was still able to sum up the game in true stinky golfer fashion with one simple quote:

“I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it’s silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.”

It’s quotes like these that give a voice to stinky golfers everywhere.  And for that we all have Bob Hope to thank.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: Bob Hope, Chris Rock, George Carlin, golf comedy, golf joke, golf stinks, golfstinks, Jimmy Fallon, Robin Williams, tiger woods, Titleist

Chip Shots (Video): Ever Play Hallway Golf?

July 26, 2012 | By Chris Chirico | Leave a Comment

Lets say you’ve been looking forward all week to your round on Saturday morning.  You’ve blown off every other plan you have to hit the links with your buddies.  But Saturday comes and it’s pouring. 

Or maybe you’re away on business or travelling for work.  You’re stuck in a hotel with no opportunity to get on the course during the day.

Better (or worse) yet, it’s January and you live in the northern part of the country.  No golf except at the indoor range for you over the next couple of months. 

What to do now?  Well, it seems Jimmy Fallon just might have your answer.  Along with his playing partner, Chris Rock, Jimmy helps to find a great way to cure the off-the-course blues.  Oh, and the jabs at Tiger don’t hurt either.  Ladies and gentlemen…enjoy a few minutes of comedy while the guys play Hallway Golf!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: chip shots, Chris Rock, golf stinks, golfstinks, Hallway Golf, Jimmy Fallon, round of golf, tiger woods

Giving Golf A Second Chance

July 16, 2012 | By Chris Chirico | 1 Comment

The old second chance.  Many people deserve it.  Few get it.  But what about golf?  How many people do you think quit the game and leave it behind for good?  I’ll bet it’s a much higher number than the people who quit the game and come back.  But I recently read an article about a man who plans on doing just that. 

This particular gentleman gave up the game back in high school.  Now that in itself is kind of strange, being that it seems to be the time when many are being introduced to the game.  It was for me.  I didn’t start playing in high school, but I had a part-time job at a local golf course, which is where I first discovered the driving range.  But that’s about as deep into golf as I got until my mid-20’s. 

But as we’ve mentioned before, sometimes life gets in the way of golf.  It does for most of us.  There’s always something to do that keeps us away from this great game.  And once we get pulled away from the course for a significant amount of time, many of us never go back.  But thankfully, some of us do.  Our writer realized after several failed home improvement projects, that he needed something else to do with his free time.  So, looking for something more social, enter…or…re-enter golf.

So now, he’s faced with some of the the decisions with which many of us were faced when we first took up the game – taking lessons and purchasing clubs.  So if I could inject a bit of my own advice, I would like to say just a couple of things.

1.  Enjoy the game for what it is – a game.  If you take your game or your lessons too seriously, you’ll be missing out on some of the fun. 

2.  Use the time on the course for something more than just playing golf.  Make a day of it with your buddies.  Relax, talk, hang out, have a couple beers…make it a good social experience with your friends. 

3.  Understand that you will never be a pro.  And if you’re taking up the game later in life, understand that you will likely never even approach the point you think you will reach.  If you hit more bad shots than good…who gives a crap?!  Is it your job?  Are you blowing a million dollar purse?  Are you losing your chance at making the PGA Tour?  No!  You’re just out there having a good time.  Continue to do that.     

4.  As for your clubs, before you go out and dump an obscene amount of money into a driver and a set of irons, make sure you’re going to stick with the game first.  I bought a cheap set of clubs to start with and used them for a good twelve years before I got custom-fitted for a set.  And though they feel like they’re helping, my scores certainly don’t reflect it.

Point is, I’m glad to see someone returning to the game.  But I’d be happier if they were to stick with it.  And a few simple ideas with which to approach the game can make the experience all the better. 

Swing ’til you’re happy!      

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: custom club fitting, golf clubs, golf lesson, golf stinks, golfstinks, PGA TOUR, taking up golf

Chip Shots: Golf Requires Total Concentration

July 5, 2012 | By Chris Chirico | Leave a Comment

So we all know that golf requires full concentration.  You have to block-out whatever distractions are around you and put 100% focus on what you need to do in order to hit the perfect shot.  But this guy is taking it to a new level.

What do you think is going through this guys head?  Is it:

A. “I’ll show him.  Put down a bogey when he knows it was a double…”

B. “Hey, no one’s paying attention to me right now.  How will they ever know this is my fourth putt?”

C.  “Revoke my membership?  Ha!  We’ll see…”

Or D.  “What fire?”

D. would certainly show the total concentration aspect.  But it’s more fun to think it’s something else.  The question is what that something else could be to keep his round going…

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: chip shots, fire, golf, golf stinks, golfstinks

Was Golf Invented By A Drunken Scotsman?

July 2, 2012 | By Chris Chirico | 1 Comment

Anyone who plays the great game of golf knows full well that whoever created the game to begin with must have been a drunken, twisted, sadistic bastard.  I mean, what did they know?  How could they possibly fathom the idea that people would become almost addicted to this game?  And knowing that, to go and make it as difficult as it is…how and why would they do this to us?! 

When you stop and think about the difficulty of this game, between the equipment, distances and obstacles, there are really no words to describe why someone would try this game once and ever want to do it again.  Well, maybe there are words to describe the craziness of the inventors.  Just none that I could ever gather.  So in place of me…ladies, gentlemen and fellow stinky golfers, I give you…Robin Williams!

Can anyone think of a more eloquent description of this great sport?  Can anyone think of a better way to describe the completely irrational thought that went into it?  “Like a bowling lane?”  “F*** no!  I’ll put s*** in the way!”  And if that’s not good enough, to describe the green as “A flat piece with a little flag to give you f****n’ hope” is brilliant!  Because that’s all it really is…hope! 

But it ends perfectly!  You put youself through all of this anguish using a “f***ed up stick,” to aim your ball at a target toward which they’ve “put s*** in the way” including trees, tall grass and “a pool and a sandbox to f*** with your ball.”  But for some reason, we don’t do this just once – “F*** no!  Eighteen f****n’ times!”       

It’s funny how a sport so agravating can be so addictive.  Even for a guy like me who doesn’t really care how poorly he plays, I still find the game to be frustrating at times.  And I don’t even take it seriously.  I can’t imagine how a serious (but not professional) golfer does it!  If I could go back in time, I would like nothing more than to meet the creator of this fine sport and simultaneously shake their hand and punch them in the face.  And if I feel that way, how does someone who takes it seriously feel?

Swing ’til you’re happy!     

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: golf stinks, golfstinks, invention of golf, Robin Williams

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