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U.S. Open…For Business?

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Will this year's U.S. Open help golf? (photo by Bernard Gagnon / CC BY-SA 3.0)
Can this year’s U.S. Open help golf? (photo by Bernard Gagnon / CC BY-SA 3.0)

O.K., normally I don’t write much about what’s going on with the pro tours, but after a quick look at the leader board for the U.S. Open, the top five names threw me off a bit. I double-checked and made sure it was the U.S. Open Leader Board, it was, and then it hit me – I know these results were only through the first round, but is this a sign of change?

Don’t get me wrong, I know Tiger is very well capable of coming from behind (no pun intended) and winning. And Phil, man what’s happening? Here’s a quick look of the top five so far:

1. Shaun Micheel USA
2. Paul Casey ENG
3. Brendon de Jonge ZIM
4. Alex Cejka…who? GER
5. Ryo Ishikawa JAP

Does this look like a U.S Open leader board? Will the fave’s make the cut? I’m really looking forward to seeing how this plays out. It’s a little bit of change from all of this World Cup Soccer (no offense to soccer, I’m also a fan). Not to mention, I wonder how much of an impact either sporting event is having on each other (something tells me the football tourney is having more success – even here in the states)?

Anyway, maybe this U.S. Open will open the doors for some new names (God knows the tour could use them). I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who doesn’t recognize some of the players in the lead, but is that good or bad for the PGA? Stinky Golfer Chris posted the other day that the tour is trying to woo more fans – will this no-name leaderboard help it, or will it send it reeling even father than it currently is?

Time will tell, but I for one am more interested than ever! Not-to-mention, they’re out there on beautiful Pebble Beach playing golf…it doesn’t get much better than that. F@#$in’ beautiful!

Good luck no-names – I’m pulling for ya!

Risk-Reward

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Do the risks outweigh the rewards in golf? (photo by Roger Kidd / CC BY 2.0)
Do the risks outweigh the rewards in golf? (photo by Roger Kidd / CC BY 2.0)

We’ve all heard of this before, just ask Phil Mickelson. For those not too sure of the meaning, it derives from Wall Street. Investors risking potential losses (the risk) in order to gain higher returns (the reward). On the golf course this means challenging a hazard or taking a tough shot, and risk losing a stroke, to potentially gain a stroke. With that said, let me give you my twist on the ol’ double “R”.

Stinky Golfer Greg and myself recently went and played a quick nine at a local track. As we butchered our way through the course, we joked about how you always hit your best shot into the foursome in front of you. It never fails. If you are 240 yards out and there is a foursome on the green, it is inevitable, you will hit a perfect 3 wood bomb right into their line as they putt. Hence, my take on risk-reward.

The Risk: Taking your shot knowing the foursome is within reach. You know damn well that if you wait for that foursome to finish or advance, you will flub the shot and everyone in your group will chime in with “It’s a good thing you waited for them to clear out, Tiger!”

The Reward: Hitting the straightest and most beautiful golf shot…ever! Yeah, yeah I know, it’s a crappy, non-golf etiquette, greasy, selfish move. But man, is it tempting especially if the foursome in front of you is slow.

You see, this is exactly what transpired…pretty much. We were on the ninth hole (par 5) and just teed off. My ball landed in the rough maybe 10-15 feet off the fairway. There is a foursome on the green and I’m some distance away. I pull out my trusty 3 wood and examine the shot. I discuss with Greg that I probably won’t make the green, but because there is a foursome there, the golf gods will give me the distance and accuracy I need.

So, I throw caution to the wind and proceed to hit, out of the rough, an ESPN Sportscenter, U.S. Open highlight, shot-of-the-day, golf shot. As soon as the ball was struck, I felt my stomach drop and everything turned slo-mo. FFFFFFFOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEE (but just like Ralphie in the movie a “Christmas Story”, I was really thinking the F— word)! The friggin’ ball landed directly in front of one of the guys as he’s putting…WTF!

Anyway, one of the guys starts yelling at us and waiving his arms in the air. I couldn’t really make out what he was saying (he was about 240 yards away) but I returned a “Sorry!” I honestly attempted to find them in the clubhouse afterwards to apologize in person, but it seems they had already teed-off on the 10th hole. Coincidentally, Greg parked right alongside the 10th fairway and as he was putting his clubs in his trunk, his car alarm inadvertently went off – right in the middle of that same guy’s back swing. We looked at each other: “Was that them?” Greg asked. “I think so.” I replied. Needless to say, we felt it best to leave before causing any further shenanigans.

I definitely DO NOT recommend hitting into group in front of you. Sometimes mistakes are made…on purpose…call me Lefty.

Can I Get A Ruling?

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Can the hole be changed while play is going on? (photo by Esteban Maringolo / CC BY 2.0)
Can the hole be changed while play is going on? (photo by Esteban Maringolo / CC BY 2.0)

Recently, I played nine holes at a local public course with a few friends. We weren’t able to tee off until noon because of a tournament they had running that weekend. No problem, I know the men’s or women’s association get dibs on the course, tee times, tourney’s etc… Now, what I don’t get is; Do these associations trump a paying non-members rights when they are on the course playing?

Here’s what went down. We are on the 8th hole and making our approach to the green. My ball is the only one to stay on and is about 15-20 feet from the pin. The others either roll onto the fringe or end up a few feet off in the rough. As were are heading to our balls these two guys pull up, one with a hole cutting tool and the other with the cup tool. They continue to make a new hole on the green and plug the other.

By this time we were within a few feet of them and puzzled. I’ve never seen this before…ever. Some guy just changed the hole location on us before we finished the hole. The good part is that he moved it closer to my ball but we had to ask. Their reply was that because of the weekend tournament the holes must be moved. We then ask why can’t that be done early morning before the round…like every other course does it. One of the guys comes back with that he’s a member of the men’s association, this is his job and he can’t make it back early enough tomorrow.

We let that bit of foggy, unclear bantor settle for a minute. Without stating the most obvious common sense response that you could have waited for us to finish, we let them be and continue our play. I’m still not sure if those two guys, members nonetheless, understood their lack of etiquette.

So, what would the ruling on that be?

A Memorable Round…

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American flag background - shot and lit in studio
(photo by Boston Harborfest / CC BY 2.0)

I could never forget this one round of golf I played with a friend and his dad who served in Vietnam. Memorial Day is just around the corner and every year around this time I always reflect back on the stories he shared. For most veterans that served and saw action in any war, I’m pretty sure revisiting the past and relaying what they saw is or was rather difficult.

We arrived at the course, paid our fees and headed out to the first tee. As we were making our way, I noticed my friend’s dad staring at the starter’s tattoo on his arm. Turns out the starter, who was about fifteen years older than my buddie’s father, served in the same branch as he did. They were both 101st Airborne Army Rangers and had similar tat’s.

I knew my friend’s father was a Ranger and served in Vietnam but, now seemed like a good time to slide in a few curious questions about the war. Seeing that it was a fresh topic and all. Let me tell you, I’m glad I did and at the same time wished I never did. We made our way around the front nine and he told us about the basic stuff of Vietnam like where he was stationed and the pranks they pulled on each other but always seemed to avoid the gritty and gorey parts we saw on TV.

I then ask the question that will resonate in my head forever…”How close were the movies to the real thing?”. In my defense, I was about 23 or 24 years old and not quite as bright as I should have been. So, I find out he was one of the only survivors of his platoon and to this day still has some pretty big battle scars and shrapnel scars on his body.

I will not go into detail about what exactly was told to me out of respect for my friend’s father but, I will say one thing. Towards the end of our discussion he told us, “When you are in a tough situation and you feel like quitting or complaining, just think how worse things could be, you could be ducking bullets or fighting to live. Think of me, get your shit together and push through…”

My final score of 105 didn’t matter, the fact that I lost 8 balls didn’t matter, even the club that I broke didn’t bother me anymore. This was something bigger. To my friend’s dad and to all that have served, thank you!

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Golf Course…

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golfer-693488_640So, here we are on our way to hack through 18 holes when Brian* realizes he needs a new glove and a few extra golf balls. We make a quick detour and head to the local golf shop. As we pull in and look around the parking lot it seemed everybody else also needed to stop in. The place was jam packed. We all agreed that we’re here already, let’s just get in and out asap.

Let me set this story up for you. We’re all dressed in proper golf attire (even though we suck we could still look the part) and as Brian is doing his thing, I wander over to the practice mats where you can demo clubs. And then it happens…a shopper in the store asks me for help thinking I work there. I couldn’t resist and neither could Dave* (the other golfer riding with us).

I survey the store and see that there are only 2 or 3 actual store employees already swamped with customers, so I reply “Sure! How can I help?”. The man tells me he is having problems with his swing and needs some advice. Holy S#@%! This guy is asking me for swing tips (…me…the sultan of slice) and without missing a beat I instruct my new student to get up on the mat. Dave is looking on in disbelief that I’m about to give a swing lesson.

We make our introductions and begin.

Me: “Ok Mike*, before we begin do you have any medical conditions that could affect your swing?”

Mike: “Uhhh…no”

Me: “Good, have you ever been in a Mexican jail?”

Mike: “What?!?!”

Me: “Protocol.”

Mike: “No!”

Me: “Excellent! Now, I want you to go ahead and take a few swings.”

Mike makes a few swings and steps off the mat.

Me: “It seems you have a tendency to pick your head up.”

Mike: “Pick my head up? My last instructor told me that was a myth.”

Dave: ” Hey listen, if you don’t want our help that’s fine.”

Mike: ” I’m sorry guys, I didn’t mean it like that…”

Dave: “No problem, it’s forgotten. Back to business!”

From a pile of random warehouse stuff located in the back corner, Dave pulls out a bungee cord.

Dave: “Here it is! Mike, take one end of the bungee cord and hook it to your belt buckle. Bend over a bit and loop the cord around the back of your head and hook the other end back to your belt buckle. This should keep your head down”

The guy actually did it! I couldn’t look at him without laughing so I had to walk away. At this point Brian is just about done checking out and I meet up with him. Dave joins us a couple minutes later and tells us he told Mike the truth – that we weren’t instructors or employees. Apparently, Mike was a good sport about it and said he was going try it on his buddies.

Ahhh, stinking at golf rocks!

*names were changed to protect identity

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