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Stinky Golfer Paradise

The articles in this category are the epitome of the GolfStinks ethos. Here's where you'll learn how to take the frustration out of your golf game!

Shredding On A Golfboard!

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golfboardTony Hawk eat your heart out. Man, these are cool! Normally, when it comes to golf gadgets and such, we have a tendency to make light of the situation. In this case however…I want a Golfboard! Recently, in an interview with one of Golfboard’s co-founders, Paul Hodge made a great comment that just resonates:

“If you really want the industry to grow, and to be accepted by the mass market, you need to kill that stodgy conservative attitude… and you need to make it fun… and attract the younger crowds,” he said.

“Forward-thinking people in the golf industry right now realize you can’t focus on what was the game like 100 years ago. You need to focus on, what’s the game going to be like in the future?”

He couldn’t have said it any better. This just about hit’s our philosophy right on the head. Unfortunately, I haven’t had the opportunity to cruise around on one nor do I have the $3500 to buy one but if they are reading this and want to send us a late Christmas present by all means feel free!

I was very curious about the specs and performance and apparently it does not disappoint. The Golfboard coasts at about the same speed a regular golf cart, 11 MPH I believe. Sits on 9″ tires that are 3.5″ wide and can carry in excess of 250 pounds which is perfect for my fat ass. Another bonus is they can easily go 18+ holes on a charge and best of all – made in the USA! Now, about that $3500…

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Golf Gifts For Christmas?

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I’m very appreciative of anything I get as a Christmas gift.  I don’t care if it was expensive or cheap.  I don’t care if it’s big or small.  I don’t care if it’s beautiful or ugly as sin.  It’s the thought that counts, and the fact that someone took the time to get me anything at all is good enough for me.  As a matter of fact, when someone asks me what I want for Christmas, I normally just say “Nothing.  You don’t have to get me anything.”  Because I really don’t expect anything.  I truly am one of those people who would rather give than receive.

Now, on that note, I want to put in a request to anyone who does in fact want to buy me a gift for Christmas.  But it’s not a request for something.  Instead, it’s a request to not buy me something.  My only request is that you do not buy me anything golf related.  I know that sounds funny coming from a golfer, but it’s strange…when it comes to golf equipment, I would rather just purchase it myself.

It’s not that I think someone will do a poor job getting me a gift.  And it’s not that it won’t be appreciated.  It’s just with a lot of golf equipment, it’s not easy to pick out for someone else.  Like clubs for instance.  You can’t just give someone a set of clubs.  There’s so much that goes into it that can’t be just picked off of a shelf.  Same goes for a pair of golf shoes.  There have been times when I haven’t even been able to pick out a good pair of shoes.  I mean, you can try them on and walk around the store, but you really don’t know if your feet are going to be killing you by the 8th hole until you get out there and try them out.

But on the other hand, things like balls and tees are always good.  I mean, for the most part…a tee is a tee.  Some people will argue that they can’t just use any balls and they need to use specific ones.  Not me.  I have tried all different kinds and they don’t seem to make a difference to me.  I stink.  What ball I use is not going to change that.  Gift certificates are another good idea.  This way, I can get the golf accessories that I want and still pick them out myself.

So keep these things in mind if you’re looking for some last minute gifts for the golfer, or golfers, in your life.  The big ticket items are not the ones you want to purchase on your own for someone else.  Go for the accessories or the gift certificates.  When it comes to purchasing golf gifts, like a golf score, less is more.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

A Tricky Time Of Year…

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driver xmas ornamentNow that we are in the middle of the holiday season, we can be easily distracted by all the egg nog, fruit cakes and all around joyfulness this season brings. Not me. My guard is up. Seeing that my significant other does not golf and has no knowledge of golf, golf equipment or golf prices, I am very careful when I answer the question “What do I want for Christmas?”.

Fellow hacks, be careful and proceed with caution. Now, I’m not saying she’s cheap, not at all. But if I told her I want a new driver, she would see a $400 plus price tag and think I’m crazy. Not only that, her attention would then shift to the clubs in my bag and assume those were a hundred or so each. Man it’s getting deep…

Without hesitation, she says “Oh sure, you can spend thousands (a little exaggeration out of anger) on dirty golf clubs but heaven forbid I need (notice she said need, not want) a pair of shoes…” I can assure you my clubs were not in the thousands. Next thing I know, my mother-in-law is involved in this whole ordeal and I’m getting bombarded from both sides. Hey, what’s with the bucket of water and towel…?

Ok, so they wouldn’t actually water board me but you see what I’m saying? We can avoid all of this unnecessary hoopla by not asking for any golf equipment for Christmas. Unless your significant other is rich or golfs, which in that case I say “Good for you, you lucky little devil you!” So, please keep this season joyous and avoid any holiday water boarding.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Measure Quality not Quantity for your Golf Season

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A rare moment out on the links; The GolfStinks crew from left: Stinky Golfers Pete, Chris, Tom & Greg
A rare moment on the links; The GolfStinks crew from left: Stinky Golfers Pete, Chris, Tom & Greg

As I watch the snow falling outside my window, it’s becoming clear that my 2013 golfing season is over. But I’m OK with that. After all, I felt I had quality time out on the course this year.

Of course, if I told you I only played five rounds (all 9-holes each), you might think; “How can it be quality time for only five, nine-hole rounds?” But the reality is, I’m completely satisfied with the golf I played in 2013.

For starters, my wife and I welcomed our second child (a girl) in March. I knew months in advance that the timing of baby number two (right before the start of the season) would greatly hinder my number of rounds this year. So on that front, five rounds (even if they were only 9-holes each) doesn’t seem too bad.

Secondly, I played a different course for each of my rounds. I’m not one for redundancy (after all, I went on a quest to play every 18-hole public course in my state a few years back). So playing a different course each time out was a small victory for me (even if two of the rounds were the front and back of one course, played a couple months apart).

Thirdly, I was able to play with all my golfing buddies (which is easier said than done). I played a round with my dad (who rarely gets out on the course anymore); a round with the GolfStinks crew (a feat in and of itself); and a cold and blustery (yet satisfying) round at the end of the season, where one in our foursome included a former co-worker whom I hadn’t seen in a while (not to mention the course was right on the ocean).

And finally, I actually played pretty well (at least for my standards) – shooting right around my average. While my scores are the least important things on this list, they do add to the satisfaction I have with this past season. I think I was comfortable out on the course this year – probably due to the fact that I was appreciative to just be out playing. And my comfort level helped me relax, which helped me to play decently.

So what has this season taught me? Well, that it’s not about how many times you play, but rather what you make of your time out on the course. And I’m not just talking about playing well. What’s most important (at least to me) seems to be who I play with and then, to a lesser degree, where I play (followed lastly by how I play). Sprinkle in the fact that I played at all, and you can understand why I’m pretty smitten with the way my season turned out.

Sure, I’m looking forward to playing more in 2014. But I’m also looking forward to more quality time out on the course – the camaraderie and the scenery…the experience in general. And indeed that, is what this game is all about.

What Should I Do With My Golf Off-Season?

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Playing golf last weekend was a rarity.  Not the playing golf part, but the last weekend part.  Playing golf that late in the year is something I’m not sure I’ve ever done.  But, after the thought had crossed my mind, it doesn’t look like there will be much chance of playing in December.  No, with the temps here in CT dropping into the 30’s and low 40’s on a regular basis now, my golf season appears to have come to an end.

So what to do now?  How do I still get my golf fix when I can’t get out on the course over the winter?  The Golf Channel sure as heck doesn’t cut it.  And I already broke my temperature barrier of 50 degrees last month.  I’m not going to drop it below 40.  So I guess I’ll have to find some other means.

I’ll start with planning a trip or two to the indoor facility.  What I like about the indoor place we go to is you can work on every part of your game.  I can work on putting, chipping, sand traps and irons.  Although I can work on my driving there as well, because there is no actual range I can’t see the finished result.  So it ends up being only a “feel” thing.  So for driving, I’ll have to hit the outdoor range.

Ah, the outdoor range in the winter.  It’s not as bad as it sounds.  There are overhead heaters at your tee area, so it’s only bad when the wind is whipping.  But at that point, you probably shouldn’t be there to begin with.  But I need to go because I need to see where the ball is winding up.  I can’t hit the ball only 20-25 yards and make sure it feels good.  I have to see if I sliced it, hooked it or put one straight out there.

But both of these options equate to nothing more than practice.  What if I wanted to actually play a round?  Well, maybe option number three should be an out-of-season golf trip.  Every golf trip I’ve taken has been during prime golf season.  I could save some money going in the off-season.  And really, I would only need to travel somewhere that the temperature is still in the 60’s to make me happy.  I don’t need to turn it into a lavish trip at some tropical resort.  I just need it to be a little warmer than CT this time of year.

Now that I think about it, maybe that’s the step I’m missing in the off-season.  I have to get out of the habit of simply practicing and travel somewhere to actually play!  No one wants to practice, but we all want to play.  It’s more motivating.  It’s more fun.  And damn it, it’s what I want to do.  So maybe now I’m going to turn more attention to playing rather than practicing.  After all, what am I practicing for really?  I stink.  I’m always going to stink.  At least I can have fun stinking.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

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