So, how many of you have ever been out on the course with someone who simply wasn’t ready to be out there? I’m sure most of us have been in that position before, right? I would think that, out on the course, there couldn’t be anything more annoying than to play, or.., try to play with someone who has almost no idea what they are doing.
No shot is a good one, they play too slow, they don’t know any of the rules of etiquette…just awful! Why would anyone subject themselves to this? Any golfer would just be miserable. But not me. Not this time. This time we’re playing slow for a reason.
Last year I posted about taking my oldest kid out on the course for the first time. Well this past weekend, it was time for my second oldest to get out there. And I admit, I didn’t believe he was quite ready to be out there yet. He hadn’t been to the range enough, hasn’t really started to develop a decent swing and pretty much, all-around, had no game. But he wanted to play, and that’s good enough for me. I mean, he has to start somewhere sometime, right?
So I suggested we go in the mid-afternoon since I knew we’d be moving slowly and traffic on the course would be at a minimum. We went to the same 9-hole executive course which I took my oldest last year. We lined up on the first tee and wouldn’t you know who hit the best ball? Yup, you guessed it…the new guy.
But it wasn’t all gravy all the way. We took took a good 30 minutes to play the first hole. Luckily, there was no one behind us all day! So after looking at my watch a few times, a few lessons on the rules of etiquette quickly ensued.
But at the end of the day, the final numbers didn’t look so bad! Obviously, I took it easy on him and didn’t hammer him for a stroke on every drop, mishit or silly mistake. But even taking that into account…it was much better than expected! And with a little more practice, I’m sure it will improve even more next time.
So despite taking way too long to play nine holes, the day was great all around. I got another kid out to the course, interested in the game and wanting to give it another shot. With school starting this week, I’m sure our time this year will be cut short. But that leaves us an entire off-season upcoming to work on the fundamentals. And I figure with enough practice, I’ll soon be worrying about another kid who is soon to be a better golfer than me!
Swing ’til you’re happy!
Life Without Golf
Okay, so maybe I’ve been overdoing this whole ” I had surgery, poor me, and can’t golf” thing for the past few months. Hey, take it easy…it was heart surgery for Pete’s sake. In all reality, the violins have run their course. No more sad music for me. Yes, golf was out of the equation for the last few months but now…it’s game on.
Hurricane Irene, better yet Tropical Storm Irene, ruined my chances last weekend but this weekend the weather looks clear. It’s time to wreak havoc on the ol’ track. I can’t believe I’m actually going to get out there and play! Although, as silly as it may sound, I’m a little nervous about it. It’s like my first time, again.
The whole summer without golf had me thinking; what if golf never existed? What would fill that void? Ben Hogan, Arnold Palmer, Sammy Snead, Jack Nicklaus all the way to Greg Norman, Freddy Couples, Phil Mickelson, Tiger and Rory (and every other pro for that matter) would be ordinary people. Unless they excelled in other areas.
Our website would be www.____stinks.com. That would really stink! Perhaps the word “golf” would join the ranks of the other four letter words we hack’s abuse. “Get the golf outta here!” I don’t know…that just doesn’t seem to cut it. It doesn’t flow. “Ah golf, in the drink again!” Nope, definitely doesn’t work as an expletive.
What would 30 million golfers do? “Hey honey, me and the guys are going to take a 4 and a half hour walk…be back by noon.” Just think, golf tournaments would be a bunch of people wandering around outside in a field getting drunk…wait a minute…that is a golf tournament!
See you out there…
Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!
Why Do Non-golfers Play In Golf Tournaments?
Did you ever show up to one of your local golf tournaments and see this guy? Have you ever lined up for your first drive of the day but you blow it because you can’t get the image of this guy’s bowtie and knickers out of your head? Yeah, me too.
When I see this guy, I can’t help but wonder to myself if he is either celebrating golf history, or if he’s just an idiot trying to be funny. Does he just want to make people laugh? Did he lose a bet? Did someone tell him he had to dress this way as a prank? Is he a golf historian celebrating days gone by? Or, does he not know a thing about golf and feels this is the way he’s supposed to dress?
Recently, I was invited by my brother-in-law to play in a golf tournament. Unfortunately, it was on a Friday during the week my boss was on vacation and having the two of us out on the same day simply doesn’t work. So, despite exhausting every available option, I had to take a pass.
But what struck me funny about this is, my brother-in-law is not a golfer. He doesn’t play regularly. He doesn’t play on occasion. As far as I know, he has rarely played golf in his life. So why the interest to play in golf tournaments? My guess is, it has just about nothing to do with golf.
I would have to imagine that a good part of heading to a golf tournament as a non-golfer has to do with networking. But why golf? Why network at a golf tournament when you don’t play the sport? I’ve been to networking events that had certainly cost much less than what it costs to enter a golf tournament. Heck, I’ve been to several free networking events! So again, why a golf tournament?
Well, I think the simple answer is, it’s more fun! Consider what goes on at a golf tournament. I’ve played in tournaments which, for roughly $125 or so, there is unlimited breakfast food being given out right from the start. Beer is flowing from the early hours. Various types of alcohol are being given out on several holes throughout the round. And food… oh the food!! Besides a full dinner at the end of the round, there is food out on some of the holes as well. I recall playing in one tournament where a full pig roast was happening on one of the holes!!
With all of the food, the drinks and, of course, the round of golf…doesn’t this sound a whole hell of alot more fun than your average networking event?
I’ve been playing golf pretty regularly for a relatively long time now. I’ve played in a few golf tournaments and each one of them has been a good time. I’ve also been to a few networking events. Compared to the golf tournaments, they just seem like work. So is this why my brother-in-law chose the golf tournament, even though he doesn’t golf? It makes sense to me. Hell, I’ll choose a basket-weaving tournament if they’re providing all day long food and drinks! Nothing against basket-weaving. I’m sure a tournament (if one exists) is completely invigorating.
I guess the point is, if you have to do something work related, you may as well make a good time of it. Play in the golf tournament, whether you’re a golfer or not. You may find that you like the sport! And if not, chances are you’re going to have a good time anyway!
Swing ’til you’re happy!
You’ll Rue The Day You Crossed Me, Twain.
Mark Twain will go down in golf history as the one who claimed “Golf is a good walk, ruined.” All summer I’ve been chompin’ at the bit to get out and play a friggin’ round of golf. I want to ruin my walk. You see, I was thrown a curve (surgery) and I dealt with that and the recovery process for the past 3 months.
What’s my gripe? Well, I’m finally cleared to play on this Sunday and wouldn’t you know it – f@#$in’ hurricane Irene. C’mon man…I waited all summer for this. All I could think about is another of Twain’s smart-ass comments. This one coming from his “The Weather” speech:
“I reverently believe that the Maker who made us all makes everything in New England but the weather. I don’t know who makes that…”
Hey Twain, keep your comments to yourself! I’m not mad at M.T., he’s absolutely right and that’s what chaps my ass. Golfing in New England is a crap shoot and at the same time pretty interesting. Other than having probably one of the shortest seasons, the views and landscapes can be amazing. In the 6 month or so golf season, you’ll actually golf through 3 seasons, spring, summer and fall.
Enough about the scenery, let’s get back to the issue – this hurricane and me not golfing. I’m almost tempted to get out there early before Irene really hits us. I figure if I time it right and have the wind to my back…400 yard drives easily. Call me crazy but I’ll bet a light bulb just went on for a few of you. And no, I’m not really going to do that and I would advise you don’t either.
In all seriousness, if you are in the path of this storm please be safe…we want to see you out on the links again.
Hit’em long…yell FORE!!
The Things We Do For Golf
I have a buddy whose wife doesn’t let him play golf on the weekends (I know what you’re thinking…and I had the same reaction). It’s not like this guy loafs around Monday through Friday either – he has a full-time job! But, I try not to judge – there’s always reasons for your particular situation and perhaps his is well-warranted (probably not, but I’ll throw the poor guy a friggin’ bone).
Anyway, to get his golf fix, this guy has to squeeze in 9-holes before work. He had mentioned that to me previously, but I didn’t understand the gravity of the situation until I actually played with him one day. We had to tee off at 6:30AM so he could be at work by 9. On top of that, the course was 20 minutes from my house, which means I had to be up at 5:30AM to get myself dressed, grab some breakfast and get there on time.
Five-thirty in the morning. Some of you may think I’m a wimp, but realize I’m also part of Generation X. I don’t think we’ve ever gotten up at 5:30 in the morning…for anything. My great uncle would get up at 5:30AM every day – this was his routine ever since returning home from WWII. But me? There’s a reason they say “rise and shine” and if the sun ain’t up yet, neither am I.
But there I was, driving to the course still smarting about the hour. Yet, when I arrived, my buddy was as giddy as a school girl. He was so excited about playing with someone else, he was beside himself. And that got me thinking about the things we do for this game we love.
Everyday, golfers everywhere are moving things around on their calendars to make room for golf. Doctors are rescheduling surgeries appointments to make their tee-times; lawyers are cramming into the course parking lot the second court adjourns for the day; and the average Joe…he too is manuvering around his personal life’s responsibilities…just to play the game he loves.
Last year, I posted about how softball was ruining my golf swing. In that post, I declared I was no longer going to worry about what other “swinging” sports will do to my golf game. But for more than a decade, I refused to play softball because I didn’t want to screw up my golf swing. Think about that for a minute. I put-off having fun with my buddies in their Wednesday night softball league so I could continue hacking every weekend on the course. Where is the sense in that? But I did it because I loved golf.
What about clubs and equipment and apparel? We spend oodles. And golf gadgets? Wow. Stinky Golfer Chris and I are currently wearing a bracelet with a hologram on it in hopes of improving our balance on the course. WHY? Because we love golf.
Subscribe to any golf magazines? Ever spend money on lessons from a pro? Ever spend several minutes in Target (or Wal-Mart) trying to figure out which golf balls you should buy when your wife and child are waiting in the car and you were only supposed to be going in for a gallon of milk? We love golf.
And now perhaps the most controversial one: Have you ever spent a ton of money to play an awesome course you felt you really weren’t good enough to be playing in the first place? Ah yes…You love this game. And never be ashamed of playing a top-notch course. It doesn’t matter if your handicap is so high you’re embarrassed to tell people – treat yourself once in a while – you deserve it.
So remember: You don’t have to be good at golf to love it. Want proof? Think about all the things you do just to play it. Ah, the things we do for love golf.
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