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Stinky Golfer Paradise

The articles in this category are the epitome of the GolfStinks ethos. Here's where you'll learn how to take the frustration out of your golf game!

Using Golf As Leverage

April 29, 2013 | By Chris Chirico | 2 Comments

I remember when I first introduced my boys to golf – I honestly thought I may have been wasting my time.  They were both into sports such as football, baseball, basketball and soccer…more active, team sports.  But I was wrong.  They both enjoyed it.  And while I wouldn’t say either of them has developed a love for it, they certainly do like to get out and play if I ask them.

But yesterday I discovered, now that I’ve begun to suck them into this addictive sport, I can use it to my advantage.  I can use golf as a weapon of sorts.  I can leverage their enjoyment of the sport to get things done.  How you ask?  Well, they enjoy golf just enough for me to get them to accomplish things around the house so they can hit the links with me!  Example:

I awoke yesterday morning to find that one of my boys was off to Six Flags with a friend of his.  The other was up early, already with his face buried in a video game.  But I had plans to end that.  I asked him what he planned on doing for the day since the weather was so beautiful.  He tells me, “I think I’m going shopping with mom,” to which I replied “Do you really want to do that?”  He replied to me with a look of intrigue that he didn’t have anything else to do.  So I said, “How about a little golf?”   His response, “Yeah!”, confirmed that I had him right where I wanted him.

See, his bedroom was a disaster.  He has this habit of hiding his dirty laundry anywhere that it will fit – under his bed, in his closet, behind his door…anywhere.  That, along with anything else that doesn’t belong where he has it, was all over his room.  So I put his want to play golf to my advantage.  “You want to play golf, you have until I get out of the shower to have this room clean or we’re not going.”  And you know what?  It worked!  I wish I started him playing golf sooner, because nothing seemed to work that well previously!

My point here is, I found another use for golf.  Besides just being a form of entertainment for me, it’s also a tool to get my kids to get their chores done!  So if you have kids, and you have yet to pass the game down to them, what are you waiting for?  You could have a cleaner house, your kids could have cleaner rooms and it all works out to you spending time with them out on the golf course!  It’s a win-win situation!  Well, that is until they figure out that I’m going to take them anyway…

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: baseball, basketball, football, golf stinks, golfstinks, Six Flags, soccer

Golf In A Whole New Light.

April 19, 2013 | By Pete Girotto | 3 Comments

sunrise-165094_640I have to say, it’s nice to wake up on a beautiful sunny day and hit the links. Actually, it’s nice to just wake up and have the opportunity to hit the links on any day. It’s the American way. Every day we have the choice to make choices. It’s called freedom and it’s fantastic!

In the wake of the Boston Marathon and recent tragedies, the steady thump of the patriotism drum is heard once again loud and clear. Stirring up feelings or emotions reminiscent of the  days and weeks following 9/11. Today, I’m proud to be an American. Just like any other day but today is special because it’s right now – the present. No matter what happens I will not be afraid to live.

Maybe the goal of these sick people that have caused these horrible events is to scare us into a  state of instability. Could be, but don’t they realize it only brings us closer and makes us stronger? Time and again, we bounce back and rise to the occasion. It’s a part of our DNA.

So, tomorrow when I wake up and have the freedom to chose what course I want to hack up, I’ll be thinking of how great it is to have this opportunity. An opportunity not to be taken for granted. It won’t matter if I snowman every hole, I will be grateful.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: 9/11, America, American, boston marathon, freedom, Sandy Hook

Masters Smorgasbord.

April 12, 2013 | By Pete Girotto | 1 Comment

masters jacketWhat an exciting week at The Masters so far. Sergio is tied for first…of course that was only after the first round and 14 year old Guan Tianlang from China shot a 73. Wait, who? Speaking of China, I’ve been doing my best to attain pro status for my Masters party. I use fine china, silverware and real glasses whenever possible but the green jacket was kind of tough. Bubba Watson guards that thing pretty closely.

If you’re wondering what the hell I’m talking about that’s because you missed my post last Friday…it’s ok…really. I’ll give you a moment to catch up here. All caught up? Great! The good news is you can still board the green jacket fiesta train to fairway tomfoolery and nineteenth hole hijinx.

Along with all the hoopla The Masters carries with it, there’s also an opportunity to make a wager or two. Being it’s one of the four majors, this tourney sees extensive Vegas action for golf. Here’s your chance to check the odds for any golf betting you desire. Will Bubba do it again? Who knows when there is that much talent out there.

As you can see we have been going over a bunch of stuff tied to the Masters, hence the smorgasbord. That said, I wanted to save the best for last. We all know the Masters is an opportune time for businesses in the golf sector to do some advertising and maybe run some specials.

I received an email for a special “Masters week discount” from Planeswing.com. Let me tell you, these guys are on to something. Not only will they help with your swing, they’ll apparently help stop your case of the runs. Check out #4 on their “Seven Common Problems Solved” list.

swing plane

I s*** you not!

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: Bubba Watson, golf, golf betting, Guan Tianlang, masters, planeswing, sergio garcia

A Masters Party…Yeah!

April 5, 2013 | By Pete Girotto | 2 Comments

Is this how you'd envision a party for The Masters?
Is this how you’d envision a party for The Masters?

As the Masters gets closer I’ve been thinking; Why not have a Masters party! Normally, when we associate throwing a party for a sporting event it’s usually the Super Bowl. It’s time to change that. I understand baseball and basketball could have scheduling conflicts with their championships because they are best out of 7 and fall on any given day. Not golf, my friend.

Golf tournaments start on Thursday and 99% of the time end on Sunday. It’s a set schedule we can plan around. As an added bonus there are 4 majors. That’s 4 opportunities if you ask me. It couldn’t work out any better especially considering the warmer weather during golf season.

So how does this thing go down? It’s simple, just like in golf we can approach this like a hack, amateur or pro.  As a hack,  you invite your buddies over on Sunday, throw out some grub and play drinking games that coincide with the tournament. For instance, when Tiger or whoever misses the fairway, you drink. As an amateur,  you follow the same outline as a hack but the festivities run from Saturday to Sunday. Also, you class it up a bit.  You know, have different flavor wings instead of just Buffalo and maybe a couple imported beers as well.

As a pro, it is our job to perform as such. We must adhere to very strict rules. So, following the basic outline of an amateur, we again raise the standard. No paper plates, plastic cutlery or plastic glasses. We begin on Monday and continue to Sunday. This includes “practice rounds” and the tournament. Most importantly, we are pro’s, a green jacket must be worn the whole week.

I think I’m on to something here…

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: amateur, hack, party, pro, Super Bowl, The Masters, tiger woods

Nothing Better Than New Clubs…

March 29, 2013 | By Pete Girotto | 2 Comments

WarehouseNew to me that is. You know the saying, one man’s trash is another man’s golf equipment…or something like that. I like to consider myself a “Jeff Smith” when it comes to golf. The frugal golfer if you will. Buying golf clubs can be quite taxing on the wallet especially in a down economy. I lucked out on my set of Mizuno’s. It just so happened that when I walked into my local golf shop there sat these barely used beauties. And luck was definitely the factor there. If I walked in a day later they would have been gone and I really despise paying retail for anything.

That was a handful (or two) of years ago and times have definitely changed. Thanks to the internet I can scour the world for pre-owned golf equipment right from my home. Unfortunately, it eliminates the local pro shop but it ups my chances of finding what I want. Using my trusty researching skills (google) I came across www.golfbidder.com and was pretty impressed at the pre-owned inventory available. The clubs are discounted and come with a warranty! Sites like this can be useful to us hacks on a budget. I see it like buying a pre owned car – no sticker shock.

You know, I think a great idea for local golf shops would be to connect with sites like this and offer their services to custom fit clubs to golfers. Create a network of companies with pre owned inventory and make it exclusive to shops. The golfer can go  in and get custom fitted. The measurements are sent out to these pre owned inventory stocking companies and if there is a match the local shop can offer the option of a pre-owned, discounted and guaranteed set or new. This eliminates any quality issues or uncertainty we may have with purchasing clubs online.

It doesn’t have to be just with custom fitted stuff only. The customer can buy whatever they want. I feel this can bring back the Mom and Pop shop and give people a warm fuzzy feeling inside knowing they got a deal and someone local they can turn to. Just my $.02…

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: Callaway, jeff smith, mizuno, pre-owned golf clubs, used clubs

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