GolfStinks

A Golf Blog for the Rest of Us!

What if You Could Play Every Round with a Pro?

| By | 4 Comments

So I’m hitting balls into the simulator at Dick’s Sporting Goods a few months ago, trying to find a new driver (see story HERE). Anyway, the pro helping me (yes, Dick’s hires PGA pros for their golf department) is named Ralph.

Ralph is a down-to-earth kinda guy and is completely amused that I write for a blog called Golf Stinks. After a few minutes of chatting, he begins telling me about an idea for an app he has – one where he can be (sort of) on the course giving advice to thousands of golfers all over the world at the same time.

This idea intrigued me and I told Ralph he should get busy developing said app. He agreed, I purchased my new driver and went on my merry way. Of course, I completely forgot about Ralph’s app idea – until about two weeks later when I received an email from Ralph explaining he had gotten a developer and Golf Pro To Go was about to become reality.

You’ve gotta hand it to old Ralphie-boy. Not many people would be inspired by talking to someone who claims they stink at golf, but it appears I had some effect on Ralph to realize his dream app – and he didn’t waste any time getting started.

Fast forward just a few short months and the Golf Pro To Go app is developed and on the iPhone app store – ripe for downloading at just $0.99 cents (Droid version is in development). But how does it work? Here’s the deal: Golf Pro To Go asks you a series of questions, which, when answered, will explain exactly how you should play whatever shot you’re faced with.

Let’s say you’re on the tee with the wind blowing right-to-left. There’s a water hazard on the left side of the fairway and grass conditions are wet. A few taps taking less than 30 seconds will give you a text-book approach to hitting your shot: “Tee up on the left side of the tee box and aim down the right center. The right to left wind will push the ball left. With trouble to the left, choose your target far enough right to allow for the wind. Wet conditions will eliminate roll.”

More complex shots are also covered (e.g. if the ball is above or below your feet or what the specific slope of the terrain is). You can also save shots – so, like me, when you’re faced with the same approach (side-hill lie, from the rough) again on the next hole, you can easily tap right over and get a refresher on how to play from that position.

Sounds simple enough, but with golf, sometimes all you need is to regroup and refocus, and Golf Pro To Go helps you to do just that. Ralph is still tweaking some things though – there’s no putting, chipping or trap play included in this version, but he assures me they’re working on it for future versions. But for a buck, you really can’t go wrong – it’s worth the dollar alone just to give you a chance to breath and mentally prepare – all just by tapping through the shot you’re faced with before you actually take it.

As a thank you for inspiring him to develop his idea into a reality, Ralph has agreed to give five Golf Stinks readers the app for free! Just email us HERE – first 5 to do so win!

Golf Genie is Genius

| By | 2 Comments

GolfGenieTeetoGreenPocketGuide

We here at Golfstinks don’t typically review golf products – in fact, we tend to poke fun at all the crazy gadgets out there. So when we post a review of something, it’s because we feel it can serve some use to the average weekend golf hack.

That being said, a few weeks ago I was contacted by someone over at Golf Genie who asked me if I would be interested in receiving their product – the Tee to Green Pocket Guide. Not being able to pass up something for free, I decided to see what this pocket golf guide had to offer.

First, let me tell you this is no zany golf gadget – it’s a practical, quick reference guide to pulling-off all the different golf shots you may encounter out on the course.

A few years ago, I read a tip in a golf magazine that actually helped me (I think it may have been the only time that’s happened)! Anyway, Nick Faldo recommended creating a tiny spreadsheet listing all your club distances (along with your half-swing distances). Then print it out, laminate it and keep in your golf bag. You have no idea how much that little paper has helped me decide which club to use while out on the course – it was the best thing I ever did to improve my game.

First section of Golf Genie? Same thing. It shows the average distance for each club for both men and women (perfect for beginners), but then gives you space to write in your own distances (once you get those down to a science). Golf Genie then proceeds to breakdown the grip, swing, shot-making, chipping, putting and even bunker play and advanced shots – all neatly and clearly explained while using graphics to enhance your understanding.

I pointed out in a post recently one of the major problems with reading swing tips in a magazine: How are you supposed to remember all the stuff you read once you’re out on the golf course? Well, Golf Genie solves this problem by packing all the swing info you’ll ever need into one pocket-sized guide – each section conveniently tabbed for easy reference. What I like though is they don’t try and get too fancy on you – they just show you the basics – which are usually what you need when you’re a beginner or have been struggling with a slice or hook (it sort of clears your head, you know? Gets you thinking straight again – back to the basics).

OK, I know this is starting to sound like an infomercial now, but Golf Genie has already shaved a few stokes off my last round – seriously. I corrected my grip mid-round based on a diagram in the guide and subsequently my shots straightened out over the last few holes.

Golf Genie has found permanent residence in my golf bag – had I not received my copy gratis, I would have gladly forked-over the $15 for it. Even more affordable is the app version, which is only $5 on the Apple app store.

So yeah, Golfstinks typically avoids telling people how they can improve their game. I mean, it’s your game, who are we to audaciously think it needs improvement? But when something affordable, practical and truly helpful actually comes along, trust us…we’ll let you know.

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Golf Course…

| By | 2 Comments

golfer-693488_640So, here we are on our way to hack through 18 holes when Brian* realizes he needs a new glove and a few extra golf balls. We make a quick detour and head to the local golf shop. As we pull in and look around the parking lot it seemed everybody else also needed to stop in. The place was jam packed. We all agreed that we’re here already, let’s just get in and out asap.

Let me set this story up for you. We’re all dressed in proper golf attire (even though we suck we could still look the part) and as Brian is doing his thing, I wander over to the practice mats where you can demo clubs. And then it happens…a shopper in the store asks me for help thinking I work there. I couldn’t resist and neither could Dave* (the other golfer riding with us).

I survey the store and see that there are only 2 or 3 actual store employees already swamped with customers, so I reply “Sure! How can I help?”. The man tells me he is having problems with his swing and needs some advice. Holy S#@%! This guy is asking me for swing tips (…me…the sultan of slice) and without missing a beat I instruct my new student to get up on the mat. Dave is looking on in disbelief that I’m about to give a swing lesson.

We make our introductions and begin.

Me: “Ok Mike*, before we begin do you have any medical conditions that could affect your swing?”

Mike: “Uhhh…no”

Me: “Good, have you ever been in a Mexican jail?”

Mike: “What?!?!”

Me: “Protocol.”

Mike: “No!”

Me: “Excellent! Now, I want you to go ahead and take a few swings.”

Mike makes a few swings and steps off the mat.

Me: “It seems you have a tendency to pick your head up.”

Mike: “Pick my head up? My last instructor told me that was a myth.”

Dave: ” Hey listen, if you don’t want our help that’s fine.”

Mike: ” I’m sorry guys, I didn’t mean it like that…”

Dave: “No problem, it’s forgotten. Back to business!”

From a pile of random warehouse stuff located in the back corner, Dave pulls out a bungee cord.

Dave: “Here it is! Mike, take one end of the bungee cord and hook it to your belt buckle. Bend over a bit and loop the cord around the back of your head and hook the other end back to your belt buckle. This should keep your head down”

The guy actually did it! I couldn’t look at him without laughing so I had to walk away. At this point Brian is just about done checking out and I meet up with him. Dave joins us a couple minutes later and tells us he told Mike the truth – that we weren’t instructors or employees. Apparently, Mike was a good sport about it and said he was going try it on his buddies.

Ahhh, stinking at golf rocks!

*names were changed to protect identity

Swing Advice and a Nervous Breakdown

| By | 8 Comments

Does swing advice only work in person? (photo by Greg D'Andrea)
Does swing advice only work in person? (photo by Greg D’Andrea)

Swing advice and a nervous breakdown can go hand-in-hand. Have you ever tried reading all the advice on how to play better golf? “The Easy Way to Perfect Impact!” “Stop Slicing Now!!” “Never Miss a Shot!!!” These are actual headlines taken from three editions of Golf Magazine (April, May and June, 2010).

In April, I’m thoroughly confused: There’s photos of the pro at impact, with numbers at his shoulder, chest, grip and clubface – all corresponding to some horse race analogy where his shoulder is relabeled as “Pony #1.” The objective is to have Pony #1 beat Pony numbers 2-4 (2=chest; 3=grip; 4=clubface) to the ball. This little imaginary trip to the Derby is expected to cure “The Problem” – which is explained as follows: “Your iron shots are weak. They don’t fly very far, and they spin in different directions from one swing to the next.” OK, if I’m spraying my iron shots all over the course at 10-yard intervals, I’m pretty sure worrying about where my shoulder is will be the least of my problems…

In May, I’m completely dumbfounded: So this one is a quick fix for a slice. It’s elaborately explained that I should take my normal grip, then lift my hands to my waist, loosen my grip and rotate the club counterclockwise and finally readdress the ball with a closed face. One whole page with 5 images, complete with close-ups of the pro’s grip showing arrows indicating a counterclockwise motion – all this and the end result is: Close your face. Thanks! Why not just tell me to aim left instead? I mean, it should have the same effect, no? Seriously, do they really think the people who read Golf Magazine are so new to the game that they wouldn’t understand “close your face?” I guess they felt it necessary to diagram blueprints on the entire process.

In June, I’m checking myself into Trembling Hills: Never Miss a [Freaking] Golf Shot! EVER! This one is a 5-page, pull-out section consisting of 4 steps complete with 10 photos, 2 charts, 1 graph, 9 call-out boxes and a graphic instructing you to go online for videos of the entire section. Just to tell you how visually overwhelming this pull-out section is, I tried to take a photo but needed to set my camera to “panoramic” mode and take three shots in order to get the entire section (and was still left off the first page). How can I possibly ingest such an extravaganza of instruction, let alone implement said instruction the next time I’m on the links? I think the short answer is (and let’s see a show of hands of those that agree with me)…you can’t.

Some may not want to hear this (including some of my fellow golf bloggers), but the reality is reading how to improve my golf swing is no help to me at all. I mean, you have to hand it to these magazines – they’re trying.

But it’s not easy to transfer what’s on the page to what’s reality on the course – especially these glossy articles that combine statistical info with graphics and photos. I look at these pages with a feeling of insurmountable odds…an overwhelming challenge that sucks all the fun out of the game.

Sure, some may argue that golf isn’t any fun when you stink. But if you want to get better, I still think the best advice is go spend money on a lesson or two from your local pro. Or, you can thoroughly enjoy the fact that you stink, like me.

An Open Letter/Pitch to The Golf Channel

| By | 3 Comments

golfstinks team
Should a reality TV show be created with average golfers as the stars?

I enjoy golf. I like getting out on the course to play. I like hanging out with my golfing buddies. I like traveling around my home state (as well as the occasional golf trip) playing different courses. I never like playing the same course twice in a row. I like that none of us takes ourselves too seriously. We all want to do well (relatively speaking), but don’t really care all that much if we don’t. Just being out on the course, enjoying ourselves, having a good time with friends, is good enough.

I think this is the real part of the game that is lost on most of us golfers. Well…, I shouldn’t say “us” since the vast majority of golfers out there today are just like me and my buddies. I should say it’s lost on the golf industry in general. We’re not great. We understand we never will be great. We just don’t have the time to ever become great and don’t care if we ever do.

However, we love to get out and play no matter if we play well or not. So why is there so little in the golf industry catered to guys like me and my buddies? Why are all the featured courses the ones that are way out of my price range…especially in this economy? Why are so many aspects of the game aimed at the scratch and low handicapper? What about the rest of us? There needs to be a fix to this, and I have a good place to start – The Golf Channel.

It’s strange – as much as I enjoy golf, I almost never find myself watching The Golf Channel. I never really wondered why until just the past couple of days. But I’ve recently come to understand – There’s simply just nothing on there for me. I don’t care all that much about the tours. I’m even less interested in highlights from some European tournament from 2007. And I am so sick of hearing fifteen different pros give me fifteen different ways to improve my short game. Who’s right? Who’s wrong? Which one works the best? WHO CARES!? It’s just confusing.

Combine that with the four to six hours worth of “paid programming” (i.e. infomercials) throughout the day, and I have virtually no reason to ever turn this channel on. I’m 99 percent sure that most weekend hacks like me feel the same. What this channel needs is a shot in the arm. A show that doesn’t take itself so damn serious. A show for all of us weekend warriors out there. A breath of fresh air. A break from the stale repetitiveness! Ladies and Gentlemen of The Golf Channel, I present my idea/pitch….Hacks vs. Tracks.

OK, so the title is just off the top of my head. We can work on that. But the general idea is to send me and the rest of my foursome (or…FOREsome) around the country to discover all of the hidden gems that never quite get the attention they deserve. Just four regular guys, NOT golf pros by any stretch of the imagination, who simply love to play the game. We’ll head to places that aren’t necessarily hotbeds for golf, but nonetheless have great courses that deserve some notoriety. We’ll hit some resorts as well as some munis. We’ll play there. We’ll eat there. We’ll sleep there. We’ll give an idea of what goes on other than golf in the area – tourist attractions, local sports, restaurants and such. But best of all, we’ll take our below-average games out to these courses, have some fun, give them some well-deserved attention, and hopefully spark some interest!

A show like this could open the eyes of a whole new group of golfers! Not to mention, drum up business for the courses and local businesses as well as the travel industry!

Consider this – I rarely watch the Travel Channel either. But I’ll turn on, and even DVR, a show like Man vs. Food. Why? Because it’s a fun show. Adam Richman (the host) is not a critic. He’s not stuffy. He comes across as just a regular guy who likes food. He’s not at the most expensive restaurants in the cities he travels to. He’s at the places with the good stuff. The stuff the locals know and love. The majority of the shows on Travel Channel don’t cater to the average person. Therefore, I have very little interest. But a show like Man vs. Food…I’m not going to miss a single episode! Since he’s come to my area, at least two of the three restaurants have been packed ever since (I have yet to visit the third). I have out-of-state friends and relatives asking me about those places. They want to hit those spots the next time they’re in town. And I want to do the same the next time I’m traveling!

This same mentality can be brought to golf. Open peoples’ eyes to some new, lesser known places, and it can only benefit everyone! Besides, I would have to imagine that a show like this would be a whole lot better than watching the latest “Get Ripped in 90 Days” infomercial!

Ladies and gentlemen of The Golf Channel….you can reach me at chris@golfstinks.com to further discuss what could only be a future success and the beginning of a wonderful relationship between your fine media outlet and 40 million hacks like me.

Thank you.

Questions / Advertise

info@golfstinks.com

Disclaimers

See here

Privacy Policy

See here