GolfStinks

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What If There Really Was A PGA Championship?

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Golf bracket
Could a 64-player bracket work in golf?

One of the greatest periods of time for a sports fan is just around the corner…March Madness. Pretty much everything about the tournament is exactly what sports fans are looking for. All the top teams, the upsets, the “Cinderellas” and, of course, the brackets.

The NCAA Tournament is one of the greatest ways to decide a champion of a particular sport. 68 teams get one game against a particular team. One shot to move onto the next round. Win six (or seven) in a row, and you’re the champ. Anyone can play anyone. Perennial powers play the small schools…upsets happen. It’s great!

Now what if this particular format was brought into the PGA Tour? What if a tournament billed as a “championship” actually was? What if there was a way to finish the season, without a ranking list or anything based on money, to determine a clear-cut champ? It sounds like the way to go if you ask me!

Wait…what? They already do this? The Accenture Match-Play Championship? How is this NOT the be all and end all?! This needs to replace the PGA Championship!

As it stands now, the PGA Championship is really just another tournament. OK, it’s a major. But in effect, it’s just another tournament. When I hear “championship,” that’s exactly what I expect it to be. It should take up two weekends and should determine an actual champion! So in another attempt to come up with ideas to make viewership and interest in this sport greater, I propose the fourth major to be held at the end of the season and be renamed The PGA Tournament Championship.

Think about that. You take the top 64 golfers in the world and pair them up by seed – #1 vs. #64, #2 vs. #63, etc., just like the Match-Play Championship. The tournament is held over a four day span as usual. However, by the time Sunday afternoon rolls around, only four golfers remain – The Final Four. The following weekend, the final four matchup. Thursday and Friday could be two one-on-one matchups, aggregate score wins each. Saturday and Sunday, the two remaining seeds face each other in the actual championship, again with aggregate score winning. I don’t know about you, but this sounds like a winner to me!

I’m not sure exactly how you figure out the seedings – World Golf Rankings, PGA Tour money list, who knows. Hey, it’s not perfect and would need to have some details hammered out. But its got its strong points. For starters, it’s an actual Championship in the truest sense of the word. It’s exciting – every matchup matters. And perhaps just as important (and the PGA would probably never want to admit it but it’s true), is the gambling aspect. Bringing in a bracket system for fans to fill out like the NCAA basketball tournament creates even further meaning for fans. Now, every fan has a vested interest in the tournament.

The more I think about it, the more I feel it’s a winner. A tournament such as the match-play championship belongs at the end of the season, and a tournament set up as such deserves not only to be a major, but to be THE major.

Every sport needs a championship game. Golf is no different. Who wants a #1 player based on some ranking system, or worse yet, based on earnings! Battle it out on the course. In the end…the one true champion will be the one still standing.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Maybe What We Need Is Beer-League Golf…

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Have you ever met the guy who has no friggin’ idea what his handicap is? You’re having a conversation and golf comes up. You say “So you play, huh? What’s your handicap?” And you get this…”No idea. I usually shoot in the upper-90’s or low 100’s.” And you give him that look like you’re thinking “How the hell does this guy not know what his handicap is?” Don’t you just hate that guy? Well guess what…that guy is me.

The only reason I have some sort of general idea about my handicap is due to Stinky Golfer Greg. He figures it out for me. Otherwise, and for the most part anyway, I’m the guy who makes the above statement.

What I can’t figure out for the life of me is, why people look at me like I have three heads when I tell them I don’t know what my handicap is? Really now…what’s the big deal? If golf is supposed to be this game you play against yourself, then why is everyone so concerned with everyone elses handicap? Do you just want to know if you’re better than me? Here, I’ll make it simple for you…I stink….you’re better….my name is Stinky Golfer Chris for cryin’ out loud! There, do you feel better about your own game now? Glad I could help.

I don’t understand why all these golfers who are not pro players (and I’m sorry to inform them, never will be) have some fascination with this number. I also fail to understand why the simple concept of playing golf just for the fun of it, goes right over the heads of most. I’ll go back to an old analogy I made – I play beer league softball. I know or run into many others who play softball also. However, I have yet to hear one of those players ask me what my batting average is. Truthfully, why would they care? It’s just softball for fun. Don’t get me wrong…we all try to win. But if we don’t…so what? I look at golf in the same light. Why is that so hard for other golfers to understand?

I guess I just don’t understand the concept of spending obscene amounts of money on golf lessons only to take my new and improved game out to my local tracks. Let’s go back to softball for a second. I try to do well when I play…but I’m not about to go take private batting lessons with Walt Hriniak or field grounders with Ozzie Smith. I play for fun! Just like I do with golf! Why is that so hard to understand?

For some reason though, golfers just don’t get that. Most golfers can’t understand that I step onto the course with every intention of having a good time. If I play well, great! If not, great! As long as I played.

See, I think like this: Once I begin to really work at golf (lots of practice, taking lessons, etc…) the game is no longer a game. It’s now work. I don’t ever want a sport that I enjoy to become work. Especially if I’m not going to get paid for it!

Am I the only one who feels this way? Does anyone else not know, or care, what their handicap is? Does anyone else play this sport simply for the fun of it? I can’t be the only one of my kind….can I?

Swing ’til you’re happy! It’s the reason I play!

Fans Love A Good Rivalry

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Ah…the rivalry games. You don’t have to be a baseball fan to understand the significance of Red Sox-Yankees. Just the same for Lakers-Celtics, Packers-Bears, North Carolina-Duke, etc… That list can go on and on.

There are the all-time great rivalries like those mentioned above. There are the rivalries that last for a few years while two teams are both hot. There are local or in-state rivalries that may not have a huge national impact, but mean the world to the fans of the two teams. The bottom line is…fans love rivalries.

But I just recently came across an old article (roughly two years old, the article is not dated) touting golf’s ten greatest rivalries. When I first came across this article, I felt I stumbled onto something interesting. Something that may help promote the sport to a new generation by focusing on or creating rivalries. Instead, I found the same old golf stuffiness. Seriously now…what is it about golf and golf writers that simply won’t allow the sport to advance into the future? What do I mean? Here, I’ll show you.

Moving through the list from 10 through 1:

#10 – USA vs. Sergio Garcia. For starters, this is not a rivalry. This is just a golfer who claims to dislike Americans. In return, many American golf fans dislike him. Further,Sergio Garcia is of relative insignificance. He has only two PGA Tour wins in the past five years and hasn’t won multiple tourneys since 2004. So who cares about Sergio? But, other than his comments about beating Americans and spitting in the cup…one of the reasons people don’t like him is his celebrations. I disagree here. I like the emotion. I would like to see more of it from other golfers. I’m tired of the “tip-of-the-cap.” Celebrate a great shot a little. Don’t rehearse it. I don’t want to see a T.O. But don’t be afraid to show a bit of emotion. Make the game more fun.

#9 – Pebble Beach vs. Augusta. Again, this is not a rivalry. This is like saying Yankee Stadium vs. Fenway. It’s great for comparisons sake – one is big, extravagant and new, the other quaint, traditional and full of character. But neither has anything to do with the games themselves. It would be Yankees-Red Sox even if the game was on a neutral field. Sure you could make the argument that playing in each other’s stadiums adds to the rivalry, but in golf, those two courses have nothing to do with an actual rivalry between players. They are just two courses. Albeit, two dream courses…but just courses nonetheless.

#8 – Robert T. Jones Jr. vs. Rees Jones. Once again…who cares? The average golf fan doesn’t give a crap about this. So two brothers don’t get along. OK, so it’s a family rivalry. But it has nothing to do with the sport itself. They just both happen to be golf course designers. Meaningless.

#7 – Sarazen vs. Hagen – Hey!! We’re four in and we actually have a player rivalry! It’s what golf fans care about! Although, they do only mention one match and it happens to be almost 80 years old. Otherwise…I’ll take it. They are after all, two of the greatest of all time.

#6 – Greg Norman vs. Tim Finchem – One is an all-time great golfer. The other is the commissioner. It’s two guys who don’t get along…but it’s not a rivalry! Not in the sense that I want anyway. Not only that, but it’s not exactly Pete Rose vs. Bart Giamatti.

#5 – Tradition vs. Technology – GET OVER IT ALREADY!! The game has advanced. It’s going to continue to advance. Just let it happen!! Equipment is going to become easier to use. Technology will make the game easier for some. Does that ruin the game? Of course not! Besides, isn’t it fun to think to yourself..”I know Tiger is great…but can you imagine what Bobby Jones would do with a set of Tiger’s clubs?” Oh, and by the way, “tradition vs. technology” is, once again, not a rivalry.

#4 – Jack Nicklaus vs. Tom Watson – No argument here.

#3 – Sam Snead vs. Ben Hogan – Ditto.

#2 – Arnold Palmer vs. Jack Nicklaus – My only issue with this one is, how is it NOT #1?!

#1 – Tiger Woods vs. Old Man Time – Oh…because Tiger had to be involved in the #1 ranking somehow. Sports Illustrated and Golf magazine were, of course, busy kissing Tiger’s ass. Tiger vs. Old Man Time? Are you kidding? He injured his knee!! How is that a rivalry???!!! Worse yet…how is that a better rivalry than Arnie vs. Jack?! What a joke.

See, I’ve mentioned before that I believe the PGA does a crappy job of promoting it’s players. No one, save the hardcore golf fans, has any idea who half the players on the tour are. Want to promote these players a little better? Then create some rivalries! Give us a reason to watch! Build up a match! Don’t give us a crappy top ten list that shows only four actual rivalries, and none of the current!

The PGA could do so much better…but they don’t. In the meantime…fewer and fewer people care. Fewer and fewer people take up the game. Fewer and fewer rounds are played every year. Fewer and fewer members of the younger generations show interest in the game…and #5 on the above list is part of the problem, not one of the “greatest rivalries.”

Swing ’til you’re happy…and find your own top ten reasons to do so.

Super Bowl Hype For Golf?

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So, much like 100+ million other people, I watched the Super Bowl this past Sunday. Another good game for America’s favorite sport as, once again, the big game lived up to it’s hype.

It kind of makes you wonder why the Super Bowl is as revered as it is. What does the Super Bowl have that the World Series doesn’t? Why are we all excited to tune into the Super Bowl, but not as much the NBA Finals, or the Stanley Cup Finals? And where does golf rank in this question?

Well, to get it out of the way quickly, my short answer to why the Super Bowl is so much more popular than the championships of other sports is…there’s only one championship game. The whole season and everything a team has played for, comes down to one game. That right there is part of the popularity for two different reasons.

Reason 1 – The sporting reason – There simply is no second chance. The team has one chance to win. It’s not a series. There is no game 2 (or 3,4,5,6 or 7 for that matter). You lose, you’re done. It’s exciting! What if there was no series in the World Series or NBA Finals. Would it have made Rangers-Giants or Lakers-Celtics even more exciting? My guess is yes!

Reason 2 – The entertainment/get-together reason – It’s just so much easier to gather friends and family for one game than it is for, somewhere between, four and seven games. Who gets together for the entire World Series? Maybe a game or two…and a game 7 if there is one. But unless there is a game 7, then who knows when the last game (the actual championship game) will really be? See, the logistics of it are just too tough to figure out.

Now take golf…it’s just a mess. The Maters, The PGA Championship, The Opens, The FedEx Cup, the money list, the rankings…what the hell?! Who’s #1 and why? I mean, I can see who’s ranked #1…but how did they get there? Especially if they haven’t actually won any tournaments! Drawing on stinky golfer Pete’s idea – there should be one single tournament to determine the season’s champion!

But since it seems highly unlikely that the PGA would completely rearrange its entire structure to accommodate a complaint that a couple of hacks at a place called golfstinks have made, it seems the next logical step to add some hype to the boredom of the golf season is…halftime shows!!

Look, the Super Bowl is a huge draw every year. But ever since 1993, when Michael Jackson performed, it’s obvious the NFL changed it’s perspective on halftime and has made every effort to bring in big names rather than the college band theme they had been doing previously. And the result? One could argue that a significant part of the reason some people watch the game at all is for the halftime show! I would rank it with the commercials, but they seem to fall flatter and flatter every year. (On a side note, beer commercials used to be funny. Now, they are just awful).

So what better way to draw more viewers (and fans at the gate), whether fans of golf or not, than to book a kick-ass rock group for the Friday (halftime of a golf tournament) night festivities? It’s working for the NFL, isn’t it? MLB and the NBA are beginning to work it in at their all-star games. Why not give it a shot?

OK, so I’m really reaching again. But hey…I’m just trying to help. A little music and entertainment never hurt anyone. Just one request…if anyone involved in the PGA halftime entertainment division is reading this…please don’t book the Black Eyed Peas. Was the halftime show a spectacle? Yes. But it was likely the worst music to ever make it to the Super Bowl.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Golfing In A Winter Wonderland

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Here's what you can do during the golf off-season... (photo by TimoHonkelaEnglish / CC BY-SA 3.0)
Here’s what you can do during the golf off-season… (photo by TimoHonkelaEnglish / CC BY-SA 3.0)

OK, so in the past I may have mentioned that I don’t play golf once the temperature drops below fifty degrees. But now that I’ve been introduced to the likes of Peter Masters and Annika Ostberg, I realize that I’m being a pansy.

Most people likely have no idea who Peter Masters and Annika Ostberg are. Neither did I until doing a bit of research. But these people are some of the best in the world, as well as the first two champions, in their sport. What sport is that you ask? Well, Snow Golf of course! Actually, for arguments sake, it was known as Ice Golf at the time.

Modern snow golf is actually credited to Tina Blomme, who created the game in 1996 and incorporated Snowgolf, Inc. in 1998. According to Wikipedia, “After developing all the products, rules and regulations, to support the sport…she [Ms. Blomme] designed and ran the first official snowgolf course next to the Ice Hotel in Quebec, Canada. Currently, she is setting up the 5 year Snow Golf Global Tour and 2020 Global Championships, in an effort to officialize the sport internationally.”

Meanwhile, there are recurring events like the Ice Golf World Championships, which have been played almost exclusively in Greenland (twice in Austria) since 1997 on the world’s northernmost golf course which is actually an ice shelf that gets reshaped every year by nature. So you may be playing the same course, but you’re never really playing the same course.

However, as cool as that may sound, the next fact may snap me back to reality. The fact has to do with where and when these tournaments are played. This year? The tournament was played earlier this month in Switzerland. Now, as desirable as a trip to Switzerland may be, whether for golf or not…, do I really want to be there in January? I’m having a hard enough time handling the snow and cold here in Connecticut! But Switzerland in January?!

I accept the fact that the people who play in these tournaments have a desire and, what I can only describe as, love for the sport. And these people make me feel like more of a pansy for not playing below fifty degrees. But I’ll tell you what…you can call me a pansy. At the end of the day, I’ll be the pansy in shorts and a polo.

Swing ’til you’re happy…as long as it’s warm enough!

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