GolfStinks

A Golf Blog for the Rest of Us!

Chip Shots: Golf Ball Thievery

| By | Leave a Comment

One of my first memories of being on a golf course was not to play the game.  Rather, I was there for much more sinister reasons.  I was a young, foolish kid hanging out with another young foolish kid.  The other foolish kid, let’s call him Matt (actually, that was his name), coerced me into causing a bit of trouble on the local links.

I remember it still clearly to this day.  We hid in the woods just steps away from one of the greens.  A ball lands by the pin and Matt hustles out, steals the ball and rushes back to the woods.  At the time, I thought it was funny as hell!  Then we tried it one more time.  We were spotted and ran for our lives.  It wasn’t fun anymore. 

Looking back, it was a pretty idiotic thing to do.  And with the amount of times I lose a ball on the course that I’m sure landed perfectly in the fairway, it seems as if the gods of golf karma are giving it back to me double.  But hey, it could have been worse.  How, you ask?  I could have been these guys…

      

OK, so it looks a bit staged.  But still pretty ballsy, no?
Swing ’til you’re happy!

Violence Hits The Golf Links

| By | 2 Comments

Rumble on the links...
Rumble on the links…

When one thinks about violence in sports, Bob Barker and Happy Gilmore not withstanding, chances are one doesn’t think of golf.  We think more about hockey or a bench-clearing brawl in a baseball game.  But a recent incident here in Connecticut has gotten me interested in where else some golf-course violence may have sprouted.  Quite surprisingly, there are more incidents than one might think.

Starting with the previously mentioned incident here in CT – an amateur golf champ apparently assaulted his caddie in the 19th hole.  Although the incident was not golf-related, it is the story that sparked my interest.  And here are a few examples I’ve found.

Back in February, a golfer in one group was stabbed with the broken shaft of a club by a golfer in another group. According to a report, one group was instructed by a course ranger to play through the group ahead of them.  This however did not sit well with a member of the group in front, and a brawl broke out.  One sliced artery later, and a golfers leg is permanently damaged.

Speaking of bench clearing brawls, check-out this story involving former National League MVP Kevin Mitchell.  Apparently, someone was talkin’ a little smack.  So Kevin decided to go “old school gangster” on him right on the 13th hole.

Several other incidents involving on-course assault in the Seattle and Dallas areas, as well as in England have cropped up recently.  And that leads me to one question…what took so long?!

Think about golf for a second.  This is not a sport filled with testosterone-fueled violence.  There’s no big hits.  There’s no one running at full-speed.  No one is going over a wall.  But, what golf does have is a knack for getting you so pissed-off that you could spit nails and scream fire.  Put two of these hot-headed golfers in any type of confrontational situation, and I can understand how these instances can occur.

So do these types of thing happen more often than most of us realize, or is this something relatively new?  Does it happen only on the public courses or does it happen in the private country clubs as well, only to be kept hush-hush so as not to ruin a reputation.

Have you ever witnessed any of this violence while out on the course?  Or worse yet, have you ever been a part of it?

Swing ’til you’re happy…just not at someone!

A Golf Trip With The Guys

| By | 1 Comment

Undoubtedly, one of a golfers favorite events of his golfing career is a golf trip with his buddies.  For too many of us, it’s an event that just doesn’t happen often enough, including for us here at Golfstinks.  But this past weekend, we finally made it back out on the road. 

OK, so we didn’t head to one of the typical golf getaways like Florida, California or Myrtle Beach.  Rather, we headed to Vermont.  Not exactly what most golfers would consider a “golfing mecca.” But that’s far from the point. 

See, the point is the getaway itself.  And between kids, wives, jobs, vacation time and previous commitments, trying to get a few guys on the same schedule is not the simplest of tasks.  So when taking a long vacation is not a possibility, simpler trips become necessity.

Necessity you say?  Well…yeah!  To me, a golf trip with your golfing pals is an absolute necessity.  The idea of traveling to a place you’ve never been to hit the links on a course you would normally never get to play is fun in itself.  But when you can combine a vacation with your friends and a few days worth of golf, it’s like taking that one day of golf you would play on a Saturday or Sunday that you wish would last longer, and stretching it out over a few days.  How could you go wrong?

Unfortunately, most people have the preconceived notion that a golf trip is too expensive.  But a bit of research and some planning at the right times can lead to some unbeatable deals.  For instance, our trip including 2 rounds of golf and two nights at a condo ran us well under $300 per person. 

What I’m getting at here is that a golf trip needs to be taken by any group of golfing friends.  Put just a little bit of effort in and an inexpensive golf trip could be much closer than expected.  If you’ve never taken a golf trip, or if it’s been a long time since you have, you’re doing yourself a disservice.  It’s time to hit the road, jump on a plane, do whatever!  Just get out there an go somewhere you’ve never been.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Bob Hope’s Light-Hearted Approach To Golf

| By | 2 Comments

We here at golfstinks obviously like to mix some comedy in with our golf.  And as you can see by some of our more recent posts, we like the comedians who mix a bit of golf into their routines – see Robin Williams, George Carlin and Jimmy Fallon with Chris Rock.

However, this past Friday marked the ninth anniversary of the passing of one of the greatest comedians who routinely mixed golf into his comedy – Bob Hope.

Bob Hope and Golf
Bob Hope (photo by Allan warren, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons)

But Bob Hope didn’t make fun of the game itself.  It was more of a self-depreciating type humor (He once said Titleist offered him a big contract to NOT play their balls), which was funny considering he was an avid golfer and a four handicap at his best.

Mr. Hope worked golf into his comedy routines so much that it became almost expected that a golf club would be in-hand or nearby whenever he could be seen on TV.  This included putting with a two-year-old Tiger Woods or playing in a foursome with three presidents.

But it was the golf comedy that leaves us with some of Mr. Hopes most memorable quotes.  Quotes including:

“Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.”

“I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.”

“A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.”

“Arnold Palmer told me how I could cut eight strokes off my score – skip one of the par 3s.”

It’s the non-serious and light-hearted way to which he approached the game that makes Bob Hope a hero in some forms to the average golfer.  A true voice to the stinky golfers of the world.  Despite his low handicap, Mr. Hope was still able to sum up the game in true stinky golfer fashion with one simple quote:

“I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it’s silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.”

It’s quotes like these that give a voice to stinky golfers everywhere.  And for that we all have Bob Hope to thank.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Chip Shots (Video): Ever Play Hallway Golf?

| By | Leave a Comment

Lets say you’ve been looking forward all week to your round on Saturday morning.  You’ve blown off every other plan you have to hit the links with your buddies.  But Saturday comes and it’s pouring. 

Or maybe you’re away on business or travelling for work.  You’re stuck in a hotel with no opportunity to get on the course during the day.

Better (or worse) yet, it’s January and you live in the northern part of the country.  No golf except at the indoor range for you over the next couple of months. 

What to do now?  Well, it seems Jimmy Fallon just might have your answer.  Along with his playing partner, Chris Rock, Jimmy helps to find a great way to cure the off-the-course blues.  Oh, and the jabs at Tiger don’t hurt either.  Ladies and gentlemen…enjoy a few minutes of comedy while the guys play Hallway Golf!

Questions / Advertise

info@golfstinks.com

Disclaimers

See here

Privacy Policy

See here