A Golf Blog for the Rest of Us!
Here is an actual sign posted at a golf club in Scotland, UK:
1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT.
2. FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART.
3. FORM A LOOSE GRIP.
4. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN!
5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER.
6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE.
7. IF YOU ARE TAKING TOO LONG, LET OTHERS GO AHEAD OF YOU.
8. DON’T STAND DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS.
9. QUIET PLEASE…WHILE OTHERS ARE PREPARING.
10. DON’T TAKE EXTRA STROKES.WELL DONE… NOW, FLUSH THE URINAL, GO OUTSIDE, AND TEE OFF.
The quick answer? It doesn’t. I just wanted to proclaim my disbelief! It’s really going too far now. First it was Pontiac, then Bear Stearns. I could live with both of those, even though I’m a car guy and was liking the direction in which Pontiac was going. But Hostess? I can’t take it! What’s next? Levi’s?
OK, I suppose I can live without the Twinkies. But what I’m really gonna miss are the Cup Cakes. Peeling off the top and saving it for last. Oh, the memories.
I know this has nothing to do with golf and I really should try to tie something in so.., I guess with Hostess going out of business, there could be a slight burst in the golf economy. Why? Because 18,500 people spread throughout 23 states have suddenly found themselves with a bunch of extra time on their hands. What are the odds that a percentage of them spend a little more time on the course? Hey, when I lost my last job, I certainly found some more free time for golf.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m no world traveler, but I’ve golfed in a few different places. I’ve played courses up north, and down south. I’ve golfed in the cold weather and in the tropics. But for my money, nothing beats a nice, rural New England course in the fall.
The fall is my favorite time of year, and if I can play a sport I enjoy while taking in the autumn splendor, how can that be passed up?
The cool, crisp air. Comfortable temperatures. And of course, the vibrant colors of the changing leaves. The beautiful reds, oranges and yellows blended with the greens of the pine trees and bright blue skies – there’s a reason tourists flock to New England this time of year. But we New England residents enjoy it just as much. And if we can mix golf in with the scenery, then how can that be beat?
I’ve played in a few golf tournaments in my time. And I’ve noticed that in every tournament there is one hole that sets you up to fail. There’s one hole that plays with your mind. There’s one hole that grabs at your emotions and forces you to do something that you really want to do, but know you shouldn’t. What is it you ask? It’s the long-drive hole of course!
What hole simultaneously forces you to decide between exactly what you do and don’t want to do, when deep inside you know you should just focus on your game. This hole of course.
You stare down the fairway and you see it. The sign posted right where the longest drive of the day landed. You say to yourself “If I get hold of one I could beat that.” But the little voice inside your head is telling you not to do it. You’re playing a good game, don’t risk blowing it now. You know damn well there’s just as good a chance, if not better, that you’re going to launch your ball into a neighboring fairway. But you don’t listen to that little voice. No. Instead, you pull the cover off your driver, line up over the ball, rear back and with the force only Sir Isaac Newton could truly appreciate, you hammer that drive with all your might. And you and your buddies watch as…
Well, you know what you did.
One of my first memories of being on a golf course was not to play the game. Rather, I was there for much more sinister reasons. I was a young, foolish kid hanging out with another young foolish kid. The other foolish kid, let’s call him Matt (actually, that was his name), coerced me into causing a bit of trouble on the local links.
I remember it still clearly to this day. We hid in the woods just steps away from one of the greens. A ball lands by the pin and Matt hustles out, steals the ball and rushes back to the woods. At the time, I thought it was funny as hell! Then we tried it one more time. We were spotted and ran for our lives. It wasn’t fun anymore.
Looking back, it was a pretty idiotic thing to do. And with the amount of times I lose a ball on the course that I’m sure landed perfectly in the fairway, it seems as if the gods of golf karma are giving it back to me double. But hey, it could have been worse. How, you ask? I could have been these guys…