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Make More Time For Golf

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thVYDG9HBMOne of the reasons (among many) that I don’t golf as much as I’d like is simply because I don’t have the time.  I don’t mean the time required to play a round – I don’t really care if that takes five or six hours.  I mean the time to get out to the course at all!  Between all of the commitments required in everyday life, golf has taken a backseat.  And that’s been no more apparent than during this season.  I have played exactly one 18-hole round this year.  One!  How can I even call myself a golfer with that in mind?!  Well, there are things that we can do to make time…and believe me, they’ve all crossed my mind at some point.

1. Quit your job.  Several years ago, I was laid off from my place of employment.  It was a sad time.  My boss clearly didn’t want to do it, but tough decisions had to be made.  As he shook my hand and told me how sorry he was, I said to him “Don’t worry about it.  I understand and I’ll be fine.  This just gives me a little more time to play golf.”  And that it did.  It’s amazing how much free time is made when you don’t have to go to work.  In hindsight, I probably should have been saving that money due to the whole “no job” thing.  But hey, hindsight is 20/20, and at the time it seemed like a good idea.

2. Take a leave from your job.  OK, maybe taking a leave to play golf is not necessarily the best idea I’ve ever had.  However, hear me out.  I know someone who worked their behind off for quite a while.  He saved up a bunch of loot and took six months off to travel around Europe.  Now that’s something which, to me, seems worth taking some time off of work.  That’s something most people will never have the chance to do at any point in their lives.  And here he was doing it in his 20’s.  So if you can save the money and get the time, that can be turned into an extended golf trip.  Travel around the country or the world, playing your dream courses!  Again, if you have the means…it seems worth it.

3.  Married?  Don’t be.  First off, I am not suggesting you get divorced so you can play more golf.  I mean, what kind of an a-hole would ever suggest that?  What kind of jerk would suggest throwing a marriage away so you can hit the links more often?  Now, with that being said…marriages and families do seem to take time away from the course.  If golf is more important to you than a spouse and a family…don’t get married, don’t have kids.  Speaking from experience, your free weekends will quickly no longer be free.  Speaking further from experience…I will soon see if this free time actually is made.

OK, so there are my ideas.  I didn’t say they were realistic ideas.  But ideas nonetheless.  Either way, we all want to play more golf and we all need to figure out how to do it.  Lord knows I do.  Again…one 18-hole round this season?  By mid-August?  I’m on the edge of no longer being able to call myself a golfer.  I’m becoming just a guy who plays golf on occasion.

Swing ’til you’re happy!   

I Shudder at the Thought of Golfing With my Wife

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On a recent golf outing, I was paired up with a husband and wife. They were both retired and had settled into a life of golfing together.

They told stories of their recent trip to Hilton Head and Myrtle Beach; their travels to Ireland on a couples golf vacation; and their future plans to play together in Hawaii.

The pair was happy – and I had a content feeling with how they interacted on the course together – there was something very romantic about it all.

But when my mind wandered to the notion of me playing golf with my wife, that peaceful feeling was replaced with apprehension. Why? Now don’t get me wrong, I love my wife – she’s my best friend and the mother of my children. But for some reason, I shuddered at the thought of her hitting the links with me.

This weighed on me the rest of the round – what was my deal? That retired couple seemed completely smitten with each other – sharing a cart, talking golf strategy, enjoying one another’s company. What the hell was my problem?

Fast forward a few weeks to yesterday. I’m in San Francisco at a conference for work and I’m chatting with a colleague who also happens to be a fellow golfer. During our conversation, he mentions he’s about to take a golf trip with the guys.

“There’s just something about a guys golf trip.” I said as he nodded in agreement. He then said something that struck a chord with me: “I can’t play golf with my wife. She’s offered to try taking up the game, but I’m glad she never did. Nothing against my wife, but golf to me is my time with my buddies.”

He had hit the nail on the head. That was my problem – golf is my “hanging with the guys” time. It always has been – in fact, playing a round with my wife would be like time wasted – time I could have instead spent with my friends.

You see, I spend most of my free time with my wife and son. Once a month I carve out a few hours to hit the links and by God it’s going to be quality time with my pals. But of course now that I’m writing this, I feel like a complete jerk.

Perhaps I’m missing the point to all this?

Now my wife is not one for sports – especially partaking in them. She did have an interest in playing tennis once, but after couple times on the court she was over it. Meanwhile, she has never expressed any interest in golfing. And until this very moment, I’ve been completely cool with that. More than cool, in fact – I’ve been downright happy.

But the more I think about that couple, the more I realize that I might be missing out on something. It never occurred to me that I could play golf with my wife and STILL play golf with my friends. In fact, not only would it mean more time out on the links for me, but I’d be spending quality time with my wife to boot!Not only that, but vacations can now include golf. Hmmmm, I’m beginning to realize the benefits of having a spouse that plays golf. Of course the true benefit will be when we retire, after the kids are out on their own and we can travel together on golf trips like that couple.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Step number one is to convince my wife to golf (never thought I’d say that). If I can introduce her to the game slowly, by the time we’re ready to retire we’ll have a future of golf to look forward to.

Of course if she tries golf and doesn’t like it, I’m back to just playing with my pals. But that’s fine too. The point is I’ve realized that I love golf; and I love my wife – why not enjoy the company of both?

How to Leverage Your “Honey Do” List for Golf

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Go about your to-do list the right way and you could play golf too!

It’s that time of year again! The days are getting longer; the flowers are blooming; and the temps are rising! You know what that means!

  • The garage needs cleaning
  • The attic needs organizing
  • The lawn needs mowing
  • The garden needs weeding
  • The steps need fixing
  • The fence needs mending
  • The shutters need painting

Yep, springtime isn’t only about golf – that “honey do” list has been growing since last fall. It’s a rather cruel twist of fate that we’ve been pent-up for the last several months, chomping at the bit to get out on the links and once we are able to; the rest of our life also realizes winter break is over too.

If you own a home and play golf, you know what I’m talking about. If you’re married; own a home; play golf; and your spouse doesn’t: You really know what I’m talking about.

If you live in a climate where golf is forced to have an off-season, you know the anticipation building up all winter long. In fact, the only thing on your mind in mid-January is probably golf. We go to the indoor range, but it’s not the same. Nope – nothing beats that first warm day out on a real course.

So come Spring, the first thing on your to-do list is put the clubs in the trunk and get out on the links. Unfortunately, golf isn’t the first thing on your spouse’s list. There are a plethora of other chores on that list that I can assure you haven’t been thinking about. Thus, frustration ensues.

The problem with frustration is it inevitably turns into a fight. And when you’re married, you can fight over anything – especially if it’s something stupid (like organizing the attic).

But it’s possible to avoid the fight and still get to play golf. It’s simple: You use the to-do list as leverage to go play golf. Now don’t get me wrong – I don’t want you to barter for golf with chores. I want you to go about this wisely while keeping your spouse none-the-wiser.

The key is to accept the fact that you have things to do around the house and start on them right away. Be very transparent about the whole thing – for example, post the to-do list on the fridge and cross things off as you accomplish them. Do not, I repeat, do not rush out to the course and promise to finish everything when you get back (we both know that will never happen anyway). Instead, you must sacrifice golf now, to play more golf later.

On the first beautiful Saturday this Spring, don’t head to the course. You’re going to mention that your golfing buddies wanted you to play 18, but instead, you are going to wake up early and get going on that fence (or the garage, or whatever). Work hard at accomplishing this – spend all day if you have to. On Sunday, work on the attic – again, spend all day if necessary.

With two big tasks crossed off the list, gently remind your spouse during the week about how hard you worked on them and how great the garage, fence or attic looks now. Around Wednesday or Thursday, mention that your golfing buddies want to play 18 again this coming Saturday, but you’ll have to think about it since the shutters need painting.

Now here’s where you really get to know who you’re married to. A good spouse should say something like: “Oh don’t worry about it. You missed playing last week and worked so hard on the house, you should leave the shutters for next weekend and go play.” Then you’re in like Flynn. You know you’ll be able to play golf every other weekend as long as you spend some time being productive on the home front (and the tasks go faster if there’s incentive to play golf the following weekend).

Of course, if your spouse is a slave driver and takes issue with you playing any golf before the honey do list is completed, then you should suggest a compromise – you work on the list one weekend and play golf the next (which is the same result as above, except you didn’t have to negotiate anything there).

But if they’re adamant that you complete the list before golf can begin, then you may have to bite the bullet and get working. Or, you can always start looking for divorce lawyers and try a singles golfer network. As the old joke goes: “My wife said if I don’t quit golf, she’s going to divorce me…God I’m going to miss her.”

Stinky Golfer Greg has been married for 10 years and owns a home. Of course, in no way, shape or form does this make him qualified to be giving marital advice. As such, his views and opinions do not necessarily reflect those of GolfStinks.com – unless your significant other won’t let you play golf at all…in which case we say divorce is probably inevitable.

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