GolfStinks

A Golf Blog for the Rest of Us!

Why Golf Is Aggravating.

| By | 4 Comments

tomb stone golfer
Golf is aggravating. And then you see this in the woods… (photo by Greg D’Andrea)

If you really sit back and think about it, golf seems more aggravating than it was fifty years ago (not that I was around fifty years ago but…). I mean with the advancement in technology and the overall progression of the game, shouldn’t we be better golfers? We should be…but for some reason the majority of us still stink.

Interesting isn’t it? We still dominate the demographic as average golfers and all the while there are so many golf improvement gadgets, videos and what not that supposedly make us better players. Now, if we all improved our game, that would still make us average.

Not to get all Sigmund Freud-ish but, if we all lower our scores that would change the national average from 100 (more or less) to 90 or 80 for example. And if the majority scores a 90 or 80 that would make it the national average – therefore grouping us back into the average golfer category all the while trying to improve our game.

Can you see why it’s frustrating? We bust our friggin’ ass to be better golfers only to be…average. Fifty years ago golfers were shooting the same scores as they are today even without all those golf gadgets we have now. Hmmmmm…sounds like a racket. Golf stinks but man I love this game.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Golf’s Troubled Past

| By | Leave a Comment

Who knew that golf was once a banned sport? Apparently, back in the day the Scottish brass thought it conflicted with archery lessons and didn’t allow anyone to play on Sundays due to military training.

Well, I guess driving balls at the invading English is not quite as effective as arrows. Although some of the courses I’ve been on definitely required a helmet and flak jacket…see: Mortar Range.

A quick look back at golf’s history shows that in 1457, James II of Scotland banned golf for the reason mentioned above. His son James III continued the ban in 1470, as does his son James IV in 1491. It wasn’t until 1502 when England and Scotland ended their beef (did they ever really?) that the ban was lifted.

Now, what’s really interesting is that a few years before the ban was lifted something else was going on in Scotland – whisky. That’s right…whisky. Actually, in 1494 there is the first written record of it. Through my deductive reasoning I found that; golfers that are banned from golf are not happy. Whisky makes them happy. Therefore golfers banned from golf invent and drink whisky to be happy.

Who knows though, chances are those zany Scots could have been bogarting grandpa’s ol’ cough medicine recipe for years and it wasn’t until some pissed off golfer (probably drunk) decided to let the world in on their little secret. And I thought this noble game had a proper up-bringing.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Golf, Fishing And Brewing Beer

| By | 2 Comments

So far this summer has been a wash for me as far as golf goes. Some of you know that I’ve been recovering from heart surgery and with that comes very little physical activity.

It’s been a couple months since the actual surgery and the doc’s have cleared me for light physical activity. Even though golf isn’t that demanding, a healing sternum impedes your swing and rules out a quick 9.

What to do, what to do…how about fishing? For smaller fish obviously, nothing that’ll pull me in. Believe it or not, the whole time I was fishing I thought about golf and how the two are similar. For example, a good golf swing definitely helps in striking a ball well. As does a good cast. If Skippy over there can’t cast well, there’s a good chance someone’s getting hooked. Just like when I tee off…there’s a good chance you’ll have to duck.

I have to say, the biggest similarity between the two would be they both end up pissing me off. I flub, shank and hook shots all day. I snap a line, barely get any bites and the ones that do bite get away. Oh yeah, lots of fun. Just thinking about it raises my blood pressure. Where’s my beta blockers? Maybe these “relaxing” activities aren’t as heart-healthy as I thought.

That said, it leaves one last activity…brewing my own beer. I have found that as I consume beer, it lowers the stress and anger levels that golf (and fishing) might bring. Therefore, I brewed my own beer for three reasons. 1) It’s beer 2) golf and beer just go together and 3) it helps me cope with my golf game. Now that I have stocked-up on my own home brew, I am ready to hit the links once the doc gives the thumbs up. Isn’t golf great?

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Golf’s Virtual Sticks And Stones

| By | 2 Comments

Composure as defined by the dictionary means “the state of being calm and in control of oneself.”

As a pro golfer, composure should be a part of your mental and physical being. Nothing bothers me more than someone who has been blessed with success but acts like a 3rd grader.

Recently, Rory McIlroy and golf analyst/commentator Jay Townsend got into a heated little tit for tat via Twitter. Apparently, McIlroy’s round at the Irish Open wasn’t up to par (sorry). Before I get into it, here’s what went down:

Townsend tweeted “McIlroy’s course management was shocking…” “It was some of the worst I have ever seen beyond -10 boys’ golf competition,”

McIlroy retaliated with “Shut up…you’re a commentator and failed golfer, your opinion means nothing.”

What the f$#@ is wrong with you two?!?! First of all, a tweet argument is just as bad as a text fight with your significant other…fexting if you will. Secondly, you are professionals and represent a select few that can play golf or commentate on it to earn a living. And a substantial living at that.

The only reason I’m writing about this is because golf doesn’t need any negative attention. Like it or not Rory, you are role model now to a lot of kids. I understand you are still young but if you are big enough to win the US Open, you should be big enough to act like a champion.

Just my $0.02…

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

It’s Like That Tiger…Really?

| By | 3 Comments

In case you have not heard, Tiger Woods has decided to fire his long-time caddie Steve Williams. The same man who is perhaps the epitome of loyalty. Not only being a great caddie to Tiger, but also a close friend. Through all the crap that Tiger has been through, this man had his back.

This really boggles my mind. I would think that at a time like this you would want people like Mr. Williams around you. Let’s face it though, Tiger hasn’t really been too active on the tour this season. Which would result in Steve not having much work. I’m sure he’s pretty busy but those pay days he used to get when Tiger won were pretty sweet. Now it seems like he’s only a spectator.

So what compelled El Tigre to fire him? I mean is he going to carry the bag himself? I know alimony and child support can be a bitch but come on! No need to cut corners there. What kind of strategy has the caublanasian kid concocted? I guess we will have to wit and see.

Currently, Tiger has dropped to #20 in the world rankings, he changed his coach, he’s battling injury and there’s still fragmentation of his scandal floating around. I guess why not dump the best caddie you ever had? That’ll fix the problems, right Tiger? This reminds me of Rocky 5 when Tommy Gunn drops team Balboa and goes with that Don King wannabe. The end result is never good. Maybe Tiger needs a visit from Mr. Balboa?

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Questions / Advertise

info@golfstinks.com

Disclaimers

See here

Privacy Policy

See here