GolfStinks

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When It’s Time To Pick Up Golf.

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Now. Right now is the time. So, put down whatever you’re doing and head out to your local track and start golfing. Don’t worry, just tell your boss, C.O. (as in commanding not corrections officer), S.O. (kind of like a corrections officer but more on the significant side)  or whoever we said it’s o.k. They’ll understand. In fact, they might even join you…or not and you’ll be fired. Either way you will have time to start golfing. Bonus!
Non-golfers pay attention and if any of you golfers know of any non-golfers please refer them to this. Now, when is it time to pick up golf? Great question! I’ve put together some life scenarios that point to the fact that maybe it’s time to start playing golf. Here we go:
  1. If you play a sport (other than golf) in a rec league and suffer from what I call 18/80 syndrome*.
  2. If your weekends consist of a substantial “honey-do” list and you need an escape. Hey, you don’t want to disappoint the fellas.
  3. If you are looking to succeed in business. Fact: Many deals have been forged on the course.
  4. If your weekends have time gaps during the day where you can squeeze in 9 or 18…or even if they don’t.
  5. If you are retired, semi-retired, wanna-be retired or not even close to retiring.
  6. If, as Mark Twain said, you are looking to ruin a good walk.
  7. If you are completely stressed out, frustrated, pissed off and want to make it worse.
  8. If you feel your cursing is sub par and needs more practice.
  9. If you want a chance to use our glossary.
  10. If you want to be part of something great.
There you have it, reasons to start golfing. Get out there and play dammit!
Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

* 18/80 syndrome is when you still think you can play like you are 18 but in reality you look and feel like you’re 80.

Another Future Golfer’s First Time On The Course

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So, how many of you have ever been out on the course with someone who simply wasn’t ready to be out there? I’m sure most of us have been in that position before, right? I would think that, out on the course, there couldn’t be anything more annoying than to play, or.., try to play with someone who has almost no idea what they are doing.

No shot is a good one, they play too slow, they don’t know any of the rules of etiquette…just awful! Why would anyone subject themselves to this? Any golfer would just be miserable. But not me. Not this time. This time we’re playing slow for a reason.

Last year I posted about taking my oldest kid out on the course for the first time. Well this past weekend, it was time for my second oldest to get out there. And I admit, I didn’t believe he was quite ready to be out there yet. He hadn’t been to the range enough, hasn’t really started to develop a decent swing and pretty much, all-around, had no game. But he wanted to play, and that’s good enough for me. I mean, he has to start somewhere sometime, right?

So I suggested we go in the mid-afternoon since I knew we’d be moving slowly and traffic on the course would be at a minimum. We went to the same 9-hole executive course which I took my oldest last year. We lined up on the first tee and wouldn’t you know who hit the best ball? Yup, you guessed it…the new guy.

But it wasn’t all gravy all the way. We took took a good 30 minutes to play the first hole. Luckily, there was no one behind us all day! So after looking at my watch a few times, a few lessons on the rules of etiquette quickly ensued.

But at the end of the day, the final numbers didn’t look so bad! Obviously, I took it easy on him and didn’t hammer him for a stroke on every drop, mishit or silly mistake. But even taking that into account…it was much better than expected! And with a little more practice, I’m sure it will improve even more next time.

So despite taking way too long to play nine holes, the day was great all around. I got another kid out to the course, interested in the game and wanting to give it another shot. With school starting this week, I’m sure our time this year will be cut short. But that leaves us an entire off-season upcoming to work on the fundamentals. And I figure with enough practice, I’ll soon be worrying about another kid who is soon to be a better golfer than me!

Swing ’til you’re happy!

A Game of Firsts

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Life happens, obviously. But every once in a while it hits me and for a moment there is some clarity. Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying I figured it out, all I mean is that stuff makes sense…sometimes. Like a golf swing, you know? You go through the motions and somehow it works…sometimes. How? Who the heck knows but you always remember that first time you did it.


It seems (as the title implies) golf has many significant firsts. There are the great ones such as your first hole in one, birdie or eagle. And then there’s the unspectacular firsts or the yang (because every ying has it’s yang). The bogey, double bogey, snowman or the “why did I come out and play today?”. This could also be followed by your first broken club.

More importantly, I believe there are firsts that far outweigh golf’s ying yang or balance of good and evil. Due to some current happenings around me, my ideas and train of thought have shifted. This carries over into all facets of my life. For instance, A couple weeks ago I had the honor of becoming an uncle…again. What does this mean? Well, since I don’t have kids yet and my brother doesn’t golf (I know, shame on him), I can bring my nephew out for his first golf outing.

This brings me back a little to my first attempt at golf. I call it an “attempt” because playing golf requires that you have a clue to what you are doing. This was also my first time driving a golf cart and my first time losing a ball…or five after nine holes. Regardless, I think of how great it is to share something you really enjoy with someone you care about.

It’s funny because when I first played golf I was told ” Don’t worry about the rules…just get out there a get a feel for what playing golf is all about.” I sure am glad I wasn’t told that when I first learned how to drive a car. All I can say is life gives us the opportunity to experience something for a first time. It’s a pretty big concept if you think about it.

Hit’em long, yell FORE!!! For the first time…today.

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