So I was playing 18-holes a couple of months ago – what would end up being my last round of 2014 – and I was paired up with an older gent who was, along with me, hacking his way through the round.

On one par 3, we both plunked our tee-shots into the pond in front of the green and on several other holes, we shared similar lies from the rough. I finished my round with a score in the high 90’s and I assumed he must have been in the same ballpark as I…perhaps slightly better.

So it was much to my surprise (and amusement) when I ran into him outside the clubhouse after our round and he exclaimed (in a dead-serious tone): “Even though I shot 75, I didn’t really like that course.”

BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Oh man, someone less polite would have burst-out laughing right there on the spot. But instead, I nodded my head in agreement, “Yeah it [the course] was nothing special.”

Now, I could have completely mis-read his game, but I would have put money on him not breaking 90. Maybe (and this is a big maybe) I missed him make a birdie or two and he shot 85, but I doubt it. However 75? I think the Viagra is swelling the wrong head, if you know what I mean.

I suppose he could really believe he shot a 75 – in a world where you take per-hole Mulligans and 6-foot gimmie putts, it’s possible to have the round he had and still finish with a 75. But I don’t remember him taking any Mulligans so he probably just flat-out lied about his score. And he’s not alone.

Golfers lie about their scores all the time. Occasionally they’ll say they scored worse than they did to keep their handicap static for tournament play, but for the most part, golfers fable about shooting lower than they actually do – as in the case of my story above.

But why?

Well, this harkens back to that little thing we call pride. People in general take pride in what they do and they don’t like to admit when they aren’t too good at something. Golf is a game that is particularly difficult to be successful at. So many prideful people who play golf tend to conceal the fact that, like most everyone else, they kinda stink at the game.

This sort of behavior is why you have to listen to the guy in the cubicle next to you go on and on about how good a golfer he is…until you finally get out on the course with him and he can’t hit it past the red tees. In your mind, this guy is both annoying and a liar. Whereas if he was forthcoming from the very beginning – that he’s terrible at golf like pretty much everyone else, the two of you might have ended up as good friends.

But unfortunately, golf liars are running rampant out there. And liars breed other liars until everyone verbally breaks 80 yet struggles to actually break 100 out on the course. Folks, this ridiculousness needs to stop!

The reality is golf is hard and only a very small percentage of people are good at it (like your club pro) and even a smaller percentage are really good at it (like pro tour golfers). Everyone else is just mediocre at best.

Look, lying isn’t necessary anyway because your score should always be secondary to the fact that you’re out doing something you love in the first place. So keep it real out there – both to your playing partners and yourself.

For me, golf is a game that involves coordination, concentration, relaxation and inebriation. I do not keep a handicap simply because I don’t have the extra time to practice and improve it.

If I have a good round, hit some great golf shots and birdie one or two holes, I’ll be the first to tell all my golf buddies and even those that could care less. What I don’t understand is why do people feel it necessary to tell fairytales that would rival Hans Christian Andersen.

So…What is it with the piles of horse hooey about incredible and falsified golf feats that must be told? Is it a psychological disorder? Come on, you know that 230 yard drive that turned into a 320 yard monster somewhere between teeing off and hitting the nineteenth hole? For some, the story will stick and take on a snowball effect and actually have others telling it like they were there. And for some, the jury will call the bluff (which yields a greater story) and make the defendant a certified BS’er to his buddies.

Just because the term “lie” is commonly used in golf doesn’t mean you should do it. I think almost every golfer has played a round with someone like this. The best is when a stranger joins your group, you offer to keep score and they end up being “that guy.” At first, you take the verbal diarrhea they are unloading into consideration and think; “Huh, maybe.” Then the signs start to become more visible. The extra shot to get out of the rough that you saw because they thought you weren’t looking. The two chip shots to get on the green because the first one was fat. The three putt. And finally “Put me down for a five…” Oh come on!

Pondering what just happened while heading in for a refreshment, you spot this friggin’ liar entering his info into the GHIN computer. Is this really happening? This mf’er has the balls and mentality to convince him/herself they actually shot that round. You know what? Check that person’s pockets when they leave, I bet they ripped the restaurant off for condiments.

I feel better now…until the next gripe: Hit’em hard and yell fore!