Batman Archives • GolfStinks

I was intrigued when Dave Donelson emailed me to review his “fantastic, horrific, scientifically impossible and morally reprehensible” novel about golf.

A golf writer by trade, Mr. Donelson has strung together 18 short stories that engross you in mystery, suspense, comedy and a touch of horror.

Mr. Donelson is obviously an avid golfer – his tales, while tall, are written with such familiarity of golf course antics, you begin to believe what you are reading.

And what you read is somewhat comical, somewhat frightening and somewhat candid all wrapped in one. For example, his hilarious portrait of Superman and Batman playing a competitive round together is both ridiculous, yet believable at the same time.

His creepy tales of golf course ghosts and night crawlers (such as in “Bald Peter’s Pond” and “Night Putting”) leave you feeling a bit unnerved. While other stories such as “By The Rules” and “Choker” take typical golfer frustrations to near homicidal levels.

Meanwhile, Mr. Donelson throws-in what seems to be his own candid opinions of golf in “A Not-So-Brief History Of Golf Time” and “Three Club Wind” – both of which, if you really stop to think about what he is saying, make a ton of sense!

Each story is unique but shares a common thread: Things aren’t what they seem! You’ll surely think about this book the next time you golf after a full moon and you’ll definitely think twice before hassling that foursome of ladies ahead of you.

Weird Golf is a great book for your mystery novel-loving dad this Father’s Day. And if you’re a golfer that’s at all interested in the supernatural, Weird Golf is for you. A bit fantastical? Yes. A rollicking read? Absolutely.

For more about Weird Golf or to purchase the book, please go to http://www.weirdgolf.net/.

Do you ever watch Curb Your Enthusiasm? If not, you should. If you do, do you remember that episode when Larry tells people he’s not golfing, but he dresses in khakis and a polo so everyone thinks he’s lying? Despite his explanation that he just likes the outfit, no one believes him. It’s a great episode.

Funny thing happened today. I’m in a store with my kids when one of them says to me “I think that guy is going golfing.” I ask what makes him think that. Sure enough, the answer is “Look what he’s wearing.” So I look over and, of course, find a guy wearing.., yup, you guessed it…khakis and a polo. That situation immediately makes me think of the “Curb” episode.

But, thinking into the situation even further, I start to realize that several days a week, this could be me as well. I go to work looking like this many times. It’s a pair of khakis or dress slacks and either a button-down shirt or a polo. On the days I choose to go with the polo, even my boss would make comments – “You golfing after work?” or “What, do you plan on leaving early today?”

But I guess that’s good for a few reasons. One being, even if I am going golfing, I can lie to a person with whom I may not feel like playing golf. I can simply say “No, I’m not playing today. I’m working.”

But seriously, dressing that way does give me the ability to be ready to hit the links at any moment. I can get a call at work, and within minutes of leaving, I’m on the first tee! When the phone rings, it’s like Batman seeing the Bat Signal!

I think that’s a testament to looking at golf as an every man’s game rather than with the “rich man’s game” connotation. The fact that any one of us can pretty much step away from our desks and step onto a golf course, doing not much more than changing our shoes, speaks volumes to the access we all have to this great game. Sure, it’s not an inexpensive sport, but if you play the right courses, it’s not exactly a bank-breaker either.

So keep in mind for next year to get yourself a few extra polo’s. Wear ’em to work, keep one in your car, do whatever you gotta do to be prepared. Then, you too can be Batman!

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Book Review: Weird Golf

You Look Like You’re Going Golfing?!

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