Golf Life

On this St. Patrick’s Day, I’d like to share some proof that the luck of the Irish isn’t always with you. A couple of weeks ago, I posted about the dangers of being hit with a golf ball (see “But I Yelled Fore…“). Golfstinks co-founder, Stinky Golfer Tom, followed that up by asking his fellow golf group members on LinkedIn if they had any good stories related to hitting someone or being hit – and the responses were outstanding! Out of the numerous stories we received, I chose my favorite ten below (in no particular order with my comments following).

Enjoy – and let’s hear some of your stories!

1) Kevin writes: When I was a teenager our family was at a backyard BBQ with some friends. I found a golf ball and some old ratty club and started fooling around. At one point, I dinked the ball just right and it flew across the yard and hit my little sister right between the eyes.

Way to keep it in the family, Kevin!

2) Ben writes: The story concerns my best friend who decided to run ahead to hit his ball. He was about 100 yards in front of me and we both seemed confident I could hit my 3 iron over him as we’d often done to each other. I let rip as usual…but only just caught the top of the ball. It took off like a wounded grouse, dipping fiercely in an arc, and before I could finish shouting “Watch ou…” it had landed squarely on the back of my friends head and cannoned about 30 feet in the air! He went down like he’d been shot! As can be expected my heart sank. I thought I’d just killed my best mate Andy! But as soon as I was about to sprint towards him, he sprang back…laughing himself silly!

Are you kidding? How thick is Andy’s skull? It must be like Neanderthal thick! Especially since he bent down to pick up his ball instead of watching your shot! Who does that?!?!

3) Cameron writes: Twice by the same guy! Once [while a member of my group] was lazily taking chipping strokes, talking smack and accidentally hit one perfectly square, right into my bare calf from about 6 feet away. The other time, I was waiting for him to take his shot from the fairway and knowing his tendency to shank the occasional one here or there, I wisely stood behind him on the other side of the golf cart. He caught one, just barely, on the very toe of the club; it ricocheted off the cart post straight into my kneecap. Maybe I’m missing something here…

Cameron, perhaps you’re missing the fact that you shouldn’t keep playing with this guy – he’s obviously hazardous to your health!

4) Mark writes: I was playing Cog Hill in Chicago and over-hit into the group in front of us. I saw this guy hit the ground in front of his cart and went quickly to see if I hit him, which luckily I did not. The person in question? Dick Butkus. I made one of the most feared men in the NFL flinch.

OK Mark, maybe the luck of the Irish WAS with you on that particular occasion, because if your ball had actually hit Mr. Butkus…

5) Kirstie writes: Yes, I have been hit. Over the years I have worked in the Food & Beverage side of the Golf industry many times, and I can tell you that being a “cart girl” makes you a prime target for high velocity golf balls!

Kirstie, are you sure you’re talking about being hit by golf ball and not being hit-on by a goof ball?

6) Garreth writes: I hit my grandmother on the head with a 9 iron [when I was] aged 8. I still don’t know why she was on the course with us but she was helping to tee my ball up when I started the back swing. Her head was split open and needing stitches. We left the pitch n putt course by ambulance. Thankfully she was OK and today she’s healthy in her eighties.

“I hit my grandmother on the head with a 9-iron when I was eight your honor, and it was all downhill from there…”

7) Christopher writes: My father and mother would play golf every Sunday afternoon. One summer, my mother hit her first hole in one. Several weeks later, she managed to obtain her second ace. On the very next hole, my dad drove his ball right at her golf cart and hit her on the leg. He swears that it was an accident.

Of course it was an accident, Christopher. He wasn’t aiming for her leg!

8) Merlin writes: My friend hit a clean but slightly pushed 3 iron…which hit a lady member on the back of the hand some 200 yards away. We had done our utmost to warn her of the impending slug hurtling towards her, but she had just watched it like a deer in headlights up to the point of contact, whereby she let out a cry of horror akin to someone being eaten by a large shark. When we reached the scene, the sight was extraordinary. There was a lump on the top of her hand between her thumb and wrist that looked like the ball had actually somehow been deposited under the skin; most cartoon like. It was the sort of bump you might find after Jerry had whacked Tom on the head with a baseball bat. My friend walked her back to the clubhouse and bought her a large brandy and a bucket of ice in which to place her hand; all was forgiven.

That’s an awesome idea, Merlin! Just get ’em drunk and they won’t remember you hit them!

9) Barry writes: Playing a very famous course in Scotland my friend hit the only cow in the middle of a neighbouring field, smack on the rump with the worst hook shot i have ever seen. I know it’s cruel but the noise the cow made and the grumpy way it scuttled off…very funny.

You know, out of all these stories, I think I feel bad for this cow the most.

10) Doug writes: I hit someone once a few years ago at Richter Park in CT. I sliced my drive into common woods that seperated two different holes on the front nine. This guy came up to my ball and was about to pocket it when I asked him what it was…turned out to be my ball. So he walks away and I’m left to look at a tricky shot to get my ball back to the fairway on the left. I decided to take my 3-wood and hit a low runner. Aimed right at a tree about 20 yards ahead of me and nailed it square into the [center of the] tree. The ball popped up and out of site. Next thing I know I hear that same guy who almost pocketed my ball cry out in pain from the fairway. My ball hit the tree and rebounded back and up and came down and struck him at the top of the shoulder blades as he was addressing his shot. He must have been 50 yards away from where I was standing at the time I struck the ball. Only me. PS, he was OK.

Karma, Doug. Karma.

You can find the complete discussions on the LinkedIn groups HERE, HERE and HERE.