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Does Augusta Think Girls Have Cooties?

April 6, 2012 | By Pete Girotto | 2 Comments

When I was a kid our families would get together at our grandmother’s house every Sunday. Coming from a large Italian family, this was a good way for all the aunts, uncles and cousins to see each other. Just like clockwork the older members would sit around the kitchen table drinking espresso and pick at some sort of cake or pie while the cousins would go off and play. And just like clockwork, the boys would either make some sort of a make-shift fort in the backyard or occupy a back room and then implement a “no girls allowed” policy.

This story reminds me of Augusta National Golf Club. A male-only golf club since opening in 1933. Here’s the kicker; a woman can play Augusta only if she is invited by a member but can’t become a member. What’s so secretive that only 300 or so “invited” male members are privy to? Well, well, well Augusta…the day of reckoning has come.

In the past, IBM’s CEOs were normally given memberships to the club (Note: IBM sponsors the tourney). But what if IBM’s CEO is female? Uh-oh! Enter Virginia Rometty. IBM’S new CEO and guess what? She’s a women. Sounds like Augusta is in a little bit of a pickle. Not to mention, Obama and Romney (in a rare instance) both agreed they should allow female members. Yikes, talk about pressure.

I’m pretty sure if women really wanted to be granted membership at Augusta they could get it. Females are damn good at persuasion. How often does a woman buy a man an engagement ring? There you go. I’ll bet if women used a bit of third grade reverse psychology it might work. You know, “We don’t want to be in your stupid club anyway…it smells. We’re starting our own.” The boys laugh it off and tell the girls to go start their own club but in the back of their minds they really want to know what the girl club is doing. Then the boys notice “Hey, they have sandwiches and cake. We don’t have sandwiches and cake.”

I like sandwiches and cake.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!

Related posts: Male-Only Golf Clubs: Sexist Bastards or Constitutional Right?

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: augusta national, barack obama, golf, golf stinks, golfstinks, IBM, men-only golf clubs, Mitt Romney, The Masters, Virginia Rometty

Comments

  1. Golf for Beginners says

    April 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Very funny Pete. I think there is going to be a lot of arm-twisting in the coming weeks but Augusta has the right to do what it wants. And, in the same vein, fans have right to picket & IBM has right to pull $$$.

    Reply
  2. Golf Rangefinder Shop says

    April 9, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    It would be interesting to know what is in the heads of the men of Augusta, who believe that there are no women that could add anything positive to the club. It feels like it’s just stubbornness and they may have missed an opportunity to gracefully invite a woman into their ranks.

    You know there must be some serious disagreement within the membership on this issue… but still, no one willing to stand on those principals by giving up membership to do so.

    Reply

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