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Making The Cut

March 18, 2011 | By Pete Girotto | 2 Comments

Never in my life have I ever see men acting like children as I did recently at a bar (actually, I guess it could be pretty easy to act like a child at a bar). But these guys were discussing their upcoming golf season and the foursome they want to play with.

They were so intent on excluding people and making sure this guy plays and this one doesn’t – simply because they weren’t good golfers. It was like that feeling you got at gym class when they are picking teams; you know, that “I hope they don’t pick me last” feeling.

I wasn’t even part of the conversation and I felt bad for the guy who was getting excluded. It was like a bad high school clique movie. The best part was that a couple of these gentlemen (and I use that term loosely) who were “calling the shots” weren’t even good golfers themselves. I know because one of them was my neighbor and I’ve played with him. His nickname was Hack-a-saurus Rex.

The point I’m getting at is isn’t golf supposed to be fun? That incident actually made me feel bad. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand the importance of playing with good company but when you are excluding people because of spite and childish reasons that’s just stupid. The whole point of playing recreational golf is exactly that – recreation. I guess sometimes picking good company is playing in a one-some.

Golf is a challenge in and of itself already. Why make it tougher? Get out there and play. Don’t worry about the score or who you are trying to impress. If you were meant to be a tour player you would be on tour.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: cut, foursome, fun, golf, golf stinks, golfstinks

Weekend Giveaways: Golf Genie & Golf Pro to Go

March 11, 2011 | By Golf Stinks | Leave a Comment

We here at Golfstinks like to giveaway stuff. We’ve handed out everything from free steak, to golf gift cards. Well, this weekend is no exception!

We’ve got two promotions going on at our Facebook page: One for Golf Genie and one for Golf Pro to Go!

Twenty lucky Golfstinks Facebook fans have already won the Golf Genie Practice Drills Pocket Guide (read our review) and there are 5 more to give away this weekend! All you have to do is make sure you’ve “liked” our Facebook page and you’re automatically entered to win – We’ll pick 5 random winners this Sunday evening!

Meanwhile, Golf Pro to Go (read our review of the app) is available on both the iPhone and Droid and we’re giving away 5 codes to download the iPhone version free this Sunday evening! If you (or someone you know) owns an iPhone or iPod Touch, all you have to do to enter is go to our Facebook page and “like” this post on our wall there.

That’s it! Head on over to our Facebook page and good luck!

Above: Golf Genie Practice Drills Pocket Guide; Below: Golf Pro to Go’s home screen.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: app, droid, giveaway, golf, golf genie, golf pro to go, golf stinks, golfstinks, iphone, ipod touch, practice drills

Attention Public Golf Courses: Make Room for Judge Smails

March 9, 2011 | By Greg D'Andrea | 3 Comments

Ready to trade-in that private club membership yet? No matter; there’s a chance your golf course will do it for you. According the National Golf Foundation (NGF), 94 18-hole private courses switched over to public courses in 2010.

Compare that to only 22 that switched from public to private and you start to realize what the golf real estate boom of decades past (coupled with the current economy) has done to private golf clubs. What’s more, public golf courses have increased in number in the U.S. nearly 6 percent over the last 10 years; compared to private courses, which have increased just 2 percent.

That being said, I’d like to take this time to welcome private club members to public golf course life. If your country club has been downgraded converted to a daily fee track, don’t fret – there’s still plenty of top drawer fun to be had. You just need to brush-up on some of your public golf course etiquette:

Firstly; Please take heed of the dress code: Collared shirts must not cost more than $30 and must never be tucked in. Shorts (I’m pretty sure long pants are forbidden) must not have little whales, ducks or other wildlife embroidered all over them. Also, wearing an ascot around your neck or sweater across your shoulders is an open invitation for a 9-iron enema…consider yourself warned.

Second; Please don’t linger in the club house before or after your round. Range balls aren’t free, so there’s no reason to show up too early for your tee-time. And if you’re not scoffing-down a bucket of hot-wings in the 19th-hole post round, then you probably should be driving home…after all, you should carve-out some time on the weekend to see your spouse and children.

Third; There’s going to be a wait on a few holes and you need to remember to remain calm. Take a deep breath (bring a paper bag to breathe into if necessary). This anxiety will pass once you come to terms with the fact that the round is going to take longer than 3 hours. Also, while you’re out on the course, you may get stuck behind a foursome that will appear to have never played golf before. Don’t worry – this is the Tennis Shoe Crowd and they are a completely normal occurrence. Simply play through when they are all in the woods searching for their drives.

Let me think…are there any more tips? Well these are a good starting point. Remember, there’s going to be an adjustment period, but don’t let that discourage you. Playing on a public golf course is nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, think of all the interesting people you will meet…like me! Just try to keep your chin up (not because you’re depressed over losing your elite status, but because if the Tennis Shoe Crowd is teeing off, you don’t want to get smacked in the face with an errant shot).

See you in April!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: club, course, daily fee, golf, golf stinks, golfstinks, judge smails, municipal, private, public

Golf Libs

March 4, 2011 | By Pete Girotto | Leave a Comment

Yep, you got it! Mad libs Golfstinks style. If you don’t know the rules, here’s a quick breakdown:

1. Print this post (use “share” button at the bottom of the post).

2. Fill in the blanks with a corresponding word that matches the description (i.e. noun:____ = pen)

3. Finally, take what you have filled in the blanks with and fill the story in with the corresponding word.

4. (Optional) For killing time on a Friday afternoon: Print multiple copies, pass around the office, compare stories and LYFAO!

So, let’s have a go at it…
noun:____
number:____
noun:____
adjective:____
noun:____

Holy (noun)! That drive must have been close to (number) yards. I really knocked the (noun) out of that (adjective) (noun)!

Are we having fun yet? That was just a little warm up for you. Here’s one a tad more complex:

explicit adjective:______
noun:_____
explicit adjective:_____
noun person:_____
adjective:_____
noun person:_____
noun:_____
noun plural:_____
noun:_____
adjective:_____
interjection/exclamation:_____
verb past tense:_____
noun plural:______
famous golfer:_____
explicite adjective:_____
noun:_____

My (explicit adjective) (noun) breaks my (explicit adjective) balls every time I want to golf. She says it makes me angry and intolerable. So, I called up my good friend (noun person) and we hit the links. My first tee shot was so (adjective), I surprised myself. (noun person) was shocked too. “Man, I never see you hit your (noun) like that before.” It must have been the new (noun plural) I just picked up. As we approached the (noun), I decided to use my (adjective) wedge considering it was so close. (interjection/exclamation)! I can’t believe I (verb past tense) that shot up. These new (noun plural) suck! I tell myself to relax and think. “What would (famous golfer) do? With that in mind, I set-up the next shot. “You gotta be be (explicit adjective) kidding me…again?!?!” I was so mad I broke my (noun) and went home.

Maybe, my (explicit adjective) (noun) was right.

exclamation:_____

Hit’em long…yell (exclamation)!!!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: funny golf stories, golf humor, golf stinks, golfstinks, madlibs

What If You Could Never Golf Again?

February 25, 2011 | By Pete Girotto | 1 Comment

There are a lot of things I take and have taken for granted. There are simple things in life that I overlooked and never really was thankful for. My health (for starters) is something that never really posed any problems. Generally speaking, it’s been pretty normal and participating in all types of activities was never an issue.

Recently, a visit to the doctor’s office (for a sinus infection mind you) uncovered another potentially dangerous problem and put a lot of stuff into perspective…quickly. The doc told me to lay off anything physically exerting for a while. Now, now…don’t worry I’ll be fine and back to normal in no time. What got me thinking was; What if I never went for that doctor’s visit?

I’m not getting any younger (or handsome-er) and I really look forward to hacking up the course whenever I can. This was something that got me thinking – “Holy S%#@, I could have screwed myself good.” I don’t know what I would do if I couldn’t play golf or engage in other physical activities. It’s time to really take a look at what I’ve got and be thankful.

What’s planned for the future? More golf and more gratitude. After further reviewing the situation at hand, I don’t want to hang up the sticks and miss out on any great memories or stories or the elusive hole-in-one (yet to be had). So, I’ll be thankful, take care of what needs to be done and be there when golf season opens.

Hit’em long…yell FORE! See you on the course…

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: golf stinks, golfstinks, health

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