Ok, I walk into my favorite wings and beer joint and this is what I’m greeted with when I open the door. Two half-in-the-bag hacks discussing their golf swing and giving each other tips. Normally, these sorts of conversations are common in bars but when we’re in the middle of the winter and these two guys are physically going through their golf swings…it’s annoying. They were literally standing up and showing how they address, grip and swing in between the cursing and obnoxiously loud conversation they were engaged in.

It got better. I made my way to an empty stool ordered my wings and had a quick chuckle with the barkeep. Apparently, these guys had been there since 3:00 pm and it was now 7:30 in the evening. That being said, I’m sure they were all warmed up and loose. My wings arrived and I dove in. As I made my way through the plate, I was finding these two guys quite entertaining. The only thing that would have made this better is if one of them decided to “show” the other guy how to swing. Which at one point I thought was about to happen.

So, important lessons were learned here. First of all, alcohol is a motherf—er. Secondly, after all the shenanigans and wings had been digested, the reality set in and I couldn’t help but get that “Oh sh–t…” feeling. You know the one where you question yourself if you’ve ever acted like those guys. It’s a rather disturbing moment when all I can think is how for the past 2 hours these guys were a couple idiots. Have I ever been that idiot?

Lesson definitely learned. Moving forward, I think I just set a New Year’s resolution without even thinking about it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I get wasted all the time and try to give golf lessons. I’m just raising awareness to prevent any future acts of drunken golf instructor idiocy.

Hit’em long…yell FORE!!!