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Introducing: The Stroke Clock!

March 14, 2011 | By Chris Chirico | 5 Comments

golfstinks golf stinksSlow play. It’s probably at the top of most golfers’ complaint lists. Everyone is in such a hurry to get through the game that they can’t stand to be held up for even a minute. But if everyone knows how much it burns other golfers, then why do they do it?

Many have brought up the idea that the it’s the pros who cause the game to be played so slowly. I can understand that. Watching the pros at a tournament can be flat-out boring at some points. Taking an endless amount of practice swings, wandering around the ball for a little while, then taking a few more practice swings before they finally hit the ball…my goodness! Just wake me up when he’s done already!

It’s remarkable how much that sounds like the schmuck in front of you, isn’t it? That’s because the schmuck in front of you watches the tour and thinks he can/should do what they do. Well guess what slow guy…you can’t and you shouldn’t. And I’m not one to normally complain about slow play – I feel that if you’re expecting to hurry, then you’re playing the wrong game. But when someone is deliberately that slow…, you know what I’m getting at.

So in another effort to help improve viewership of the sport as well as, indirectly, improve the pace of play on the course for the rest us, I offer you another idea from the minds of golfstinks – The Stroke Clock. As you could probably figure, the stroke clock would work much the same as both the shot clock in basketball and play clock in football – You have X amount of time to get your shot off.

Think about that for a second. Another element of competition added to a sometimes pretty dull sport to watch. Not only are you playing against the field and the course, but now you are racing a clock as well! Some benefits to the clock? Well, picking up the pace of the game for starters. No more “play suspended by darkness.” No more watching a player wander around his ball and take enough practice swings that you’d think he’s in the middle of a lesson. Just get to your ball, focus and swing already!

And of course, the benefit for the rest of non-pros, speed of play on the public tracks we hack our way through every weekend is bound to speed up as well. All of those players who take their time because that’s what they see the pros do, will have a whole new outlook on the pace of the game! Well, theoretically anyway. But one could hope!

The NBA adopted a shot clock in order to improve the pace of play, therefore increasing scoring and amping up the excitement of the game. The NFL did the same when they adjusted the play clock from 45 seconds down to 40. Even MLB occasionally attempts to speed up the pace of play by putting the pitchers on a clock. And there are penalties for not abiding by each. In the NBA, you lose possession of the ball. In the NFL it’s a five-yard penalty. And in MLB, when enforced, it’s an automatic ball for the pitcher. How about losing a stroke in golf if you don’t get your shot off within 45 seconds of arriving at your ball? Seem a bit harsh? Well, maybe for a season they administer one or two warnings before assessing the stroke penalty. But after that season…you know the rules.

And lets face it, in a sport that has as many ridiculous rules as golf does, one to speed up the pace of play and possibly make the game more exciting might be one to consider implementing.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

Filed Under: The Pro Tours Tagged With: golf, golf course, MLB, NBA, nfl, PGA, pro, rules of golf, slow play

Off Course – The Poster-Boy For All That Is Wrong With Sports

July 12, 2010 | By Chris Chirico | 6 Comments

Lebron James (photo by David Shankbone / CC BY 3.0)
Lebron James (photo by David Shankbone / CC BY 3.0)

Normally, we here at Golfstinks do our thing a little differently. We tend to approach the game of golf from a slightly different angle than most others. And today is no different.

But today, I am not going to approach the game of golf at all. Just for this one post, I want to express my opinion about something else going on in the world of sports. Rather, something that went on a few days ago.

I have come to accept the fact that most athletes, superstars especially, be it a team sport or not, are more “Me, me, me” than “Team, team, team.” But never (in my opinion) in the history of professional sports was it so blatantly obvious as it was with the recent LeBron James spectacle. Being a fan of all three major sports in the U.S., I was completely and utterly disgusted by the show Lebron James has been putting on for some time now. And it all came to a head on this past Thursday night. But I don’t want to put all of my disgust into only Lebron. It was much more than that.

It wasn’t necessarily about greed. Latrell Sprewell (who was already making over $14 million) turning down a $27 million contract, stating that he “has a family to feed” is greed. Patrick Ewing, during an NBA lockout, asking how the owners can expect them to work for the pay they are receiving as he hops into his $100,000 Mercedes, is greed. Not LeBron. He actually took less money to play elsewhere. It’s not about the money. It’s a different kind of greed.

I understand players marketing themselves. I get that. When their face is on TV, they make more money. And who doesn’t want more money? But again…this was different. I’ll start with the man himself.

Here’s a guy who is, arguably, the best player in the NBA. Personally, I don’t believe he is, I just believe he has the best statistics. But he has yet to win anything. In his seven years so far, he has reached the finals once – and was swept. But year in, and year out, it’s all about LeBron. And year in and year out, LeBron goes home empty-handed. The “King” has yet to wear a crown. Has he elevated the status of the Cleveland Cavaliers? Certainly! Have they become a much more respected franchise? Absolutely! But does that give him the right to string them along like he did? Does that give him the right to string along the people who have supported him from game 1…the always forgotten fans?

The Cavaliers have given LeBron everything he wanted. He was paid huge amounts of money. His image plastered all over the city. He wanted different players on his teams roster, and ownership went and got them. What LeBron wanted, Lebron got. But he still couldn’t get the job done. So what does he do? He parades teams in to present offers. He sets up a 1 hour TV special to showcase his decision. And he accepts the offer made by the team that will make it the easiest for him to win. And he made this decision, admittedly, without having the common courtesy to let his former team in on his decision. Don’t you think that would have been the decent thing to do? At the very least, a phone call. I can’t imagine a bigger slap in the face to the team that did everything for him. I’m sorry LeBron…but Michael Jordan didn’t need a TV special. Kobe Bryant didn’t need a TV special. And those two have actually won something. Carlos Boozer signed in Chicago, no TV special. Joe Johnson resigned with the Hawks, no TV special. Dirk Nowitzki resigned with Dallas, no TV special. Amare Stoudemire signed with the Knicks, no TV special. Chris Bosh signed with the Heat…, well…no direct TV special.

But as I mentioned, it’s not only LeBron. How about ESPN’s role in this? I mean really…was a 1-hour special necessary? I’ll admit, I tuned in until he said where he’s going. Then I changed the channel. That’s all I needed to hear. Here’s a message for ESPN – “I don’t want to hear LeBron’s feelings. I could care less. I want to watch a game! Put on a friggin’ game!” I know I am not alone when I say ESPN, intentionally or not, has helped to create the “I in team” thinking. We watch basketball highlights and all we see are dunks and threes. We watch baseball highlights and all we see are home runs and spectacular catches. We watch golf highlights and all we see is Tiger Woods. And the golf highlights are the worst! Its Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, and…”oh, by the way, so-and-so is winning…Tiger is five back of the leader.” According to ESPN, if Tiger is playing, then no one else is even worth mentioning until they have to be mentioned!

ESPN sucks up to the athletes. There, I said it. They can’t give serious sports news or an objective opinion because they are in bed with too many athletes. It’s that simple. And this LeBron James special proves it. This was not ESPN looking for an exclusive interview. This was LeBron and his representatives coming to ESPN with this idea. And ESPN, looking for ratings, soaked it up. This is a disappointing all-time low for ESPN. But wait, I have one more…

I have lost all respect for Jim Gray. How can I, or anyone, ever take him seriously again. For Jim Gray to agree to be just a pawn in this spectacle should be an outrage to anyone who considers themselves to be a good journalist. There was one question on everyone’s mind…and Jim Gray loaded us with a bunch of fluff, filler and outright crap before he got to it. “How’s your summer?” Are you serious?! “How’s your summer?” is one of your questions?! I swear if I ever see that putz on my TV again, I am instantly changing the channel. I don’t care if he’s interviewing one of my family members…they can fill me in later. This was worse than when the Yankees were telling the YES network’s Kimberly Jones which questions to ask Joe Torre during her interviews. It was just pathetic.

I know what LeBron James was trying to do. But it seriously backfired. The only people right now who probably don’t believe that, are Miami Heat fans and LeBron fans who believe he can do no wrong. Everyone else, sports purists especially, are looking at Lebron James as selfish, narcissistic, back-stabbing, and a coward. Me included. And it’s too bad because I like LeBron. But after all this, I’m just sick of him. He comes across as a player who feels he is bigger than everyone and everything else. At this point, I don’t want to see him win a championship. I hope Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert is right. I hope they do win a championship before LeBron does. As long as it’s not against my Lakers, then it’s OK with me.

In my opinion, LeBron James came out of this event representing almost everything that is wrong with sports and athletes today. There is no two-ways about it. He looked bad. Plain and simple. He looked bad. People will say that once he wins a championship, all will be forgotten. Well, try telling that to people in Cleveland.

Filed Under: The Pro Tours Tagged With: athlete, ESPN, Jim Gray, LeBron James, NBA, tiger woods

A Real "Grip It and Rip It"

January 11, 2010 | By Chris Chirico | 1 Comment

I’m a huge football fan. By far my favorite sport. The NFL especially. I can give or take college football. Between too many mismatches, way too many meaningless bowl games, no playoff system in FBS, the whole BCS system, the pansy overtime rules…there’s just so much to dislike. But hey, it’s still football, so that makes it OK.

But on Sunday afternoons, I don’t want to know anything from anyone. I want to plant my ass on the couch for the next ten hours and not be disturbed. Don’t call my phone because I won’t answer. Don’t send me an email because I’m not checking it. And for heaven’s sake, between the months of September and early February, if you want me to show up to your birthday parties, kids birthday parties, social gatherings and various other events, plan to have them on Saturdays. If that’s not possible, then you’d better plan on having a TV somewhere in the general vicinity. Otherwise, you’ll get my card and/or gift either in the mail or the next time I see you.

I like football. But something strange happened just a few recent weeks ago. I was in the midst of my usual Sunday afternoon routine when, for some still unknown reason (maybe I was stuck watching the Jets), I changed the channel and found myself strangely drawn to what I had stumbled upon. At first I tried to resist and return to football, but every time a commercial was on, I went right back to my new found attraction.

What was it you ask? What was it that could possibly pull me away from my beloved NFL? It was an exhibition. An exhibition of accuracy, power and skill. It was the RE/MAX World Long Drive Championship and quite simply, I couldn’t take my eyes off of it. They say “Chicks dig the long ball.” Well guess what…so do I. And so do most other golfers and golf fans. Think about when you’re on the course with your buddies. When someone sinks a nice putt or makes a great chip…that’s all that’s said – “Nice putt man” or “great up-and-down” – that’s it. But when a member of your foursome rips into a drive that sails about 320 down the pipe…now there’s a reaction from the other guys in the area! We all know it’s only part of the game, but people love to see it. It’s like the home run in baseball. Sometimes it may be completely meaningless…but people still love to oooh and aaah when it happens.

This gets me thinking; Why is the PGA not capitalizing on the potential popularity of this by creating their own exhibition? Think about it. MLB has the immensely popular Home Run Derby. The NBA has two popular exhibitions with the slam-dunk contest and the three-point shootout. These leagues have figured out this is what fans love to see. So they give it to them! Why not have some of the long drivers on the PGA tour take on some of the guys from the LDA on the Wednesday before one (or more) of the majors? Not only could they possibly gain some TV time, but they could sure make some extra money at the gate with an extra day for the fans to get in!

Wouldn’t you like to see John Daly grab hold of one of those custom 50″ drivers and just tear into one? Wouldn’t it be great to see him go up against five-time long drive champ Jason Zuback who is more than capable of 400+ yard drives on an almost regular basis?! Now that’s a show! Another benefit for the PGA would be to get fans more familiar with some of the golfers most of us have never heard of.

Anyone know who Robert Garrigus is? No? That’s because he was #127 on the money list. But he led the tour in driving distance at 312 yards. How about Charley Hoffman? He was #41 on the money list, certainly off the radar for many fans. But did you know he hit a 467-yard drive at the Valero Open in 2009? That’s right, I just said 4-6-7! Dustin Johnson was 15th on the money list, so he’s more recognizable. But did you know he hit five drives last year over 400 yards? Take any one of these three guys, put a custom long-drive club in their hands, and you have a damn good show!

I feel, especially with the #1 golfer temporarily out of the picture, now is the time to experiment with some things that may help to draw the fans that will undoubtedly be missing from some of the tournaments. Hey if the Home Run Derby can go from a tape-delayed exhibition in the mid-80’s (inspired by a TV series which ran for a few months in 1960) to what it is today, then why can’t the PGA do the same? For crying out loud, take your noses out of the air, stop taking the sport so serious and give the fans something to watch simply because it’s fun. The fans will thank you for it.

For more information on the Long Drivers of America and the RE/MAX World Long Drive Championship, check out http://www.longdrivers.com/.

Filed Under: The Pro Tours Tagged With: BCS, driver, FBS, football, Jason Zuback, John Daly, long drive, Long Drivers of America, MLB, NBA, nfl, PGA, PGA TOUR, RE/MAX World Long Drive Championship

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