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You’re Not As Good At Golf As You Think

June 2, 2014 | By Chris Chirico | 1 Comment

slow-play-golfer…and the way you play doesn’t help.  It’s not that everyone doesn’t have a chance to be a good golfer.  Take it from me…I’m terrible.  But even I know that if I was to really take the time to practice, take lessons and basically play as much as possible, I could be a good golfer also.  But I’m not going to do any of that stuff.  I’m going to just play when I get a chance and not turn it into more than it is.  But there are too many others who have not yet accepted that reality.

What, or who, I’m talking about is the twosome I got stuck behind during my last round of golf.  A couple of guys playing at their local nine-hole course, putzing their way around, taking their sweet time…trying as hard as they can to look like the guys on TV.  Don’t they realize they are screwing it up for everyone, and possibly hurting themselves in the process?

I’ll start with the tee box and the fairway/rough.  The longer you hover over the ball, standing as still as possible, the more you are psyching yourself out.  Think of it as a baseball player standing in the batters box.  When the pitcher takes too long to throw the ball, the batter calls for time.  Why?  It gets uncomfortable just standing there.  The same is happening to you when you’re just standing on the tee box over your ball.  Plus, you’re pissing off the people behind you.

Moving onto the green, the same problem exists here.  However, we are also treated to a few moments worth of staring down the ball from every conceivable angle.  We start behind the ball,  then we walk around to the other side to make sure it looks the same.  Then, rather than a simple kneel-down, maybe we’ll add in the occasional “lie down on the green” behind the ball.  Once again, you are psyching yourself out.  And once again, you are pissing off the people behind you.

This all wouldn’t be so bad had the end result been a good shot.  But when I watch your drive sail clear off into the woods, followed by a couple of duck hooks and a three-putt…it’s time to change your approach.  This is the time to realize that golf, for most of us, is a game – no more, no less.  It shouldn’t be taken as seriously as you take it.  You shouldn’t rush it, but you shouldn’t waste time either.  And most of all, you shouldn’t piss off the people behind you.

Swing ’til you’re happy!

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Filed Under: Stinky Golfer Paradise Tagged With: golf stinks, golfstinks, slow play

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